Today marks 8 weeks in the ministry of interior?!? There has been some post on one of the groups regarding some movement in the ministry of interior/passport. I really want to believe it... I really do, but I guess I'll believe it when I see it.
I guess my batteries have run out...lol. I haven't stopped scrubbing for days it seems and I am tired. My body, mind and soul told me to rest today...lol I took it mostly easy (with the exception of at least 6 loads of laundry that I folded) You know, someday, maybe someday, my laundry problem will be a thing of the past. It seems like the easiest thing to forget when I am consumed with doing other things!
I took Ty out after dinner so he could ride his new toy... boy oh boy! Yesterday I went through all the rules and played the stop and go game to make sure he knew the basic rules before we venture out of the backyard. He still has a *few* days of driving school..lol
The 5 basic rules he needs to know by heart before venturing are as follows... (Believe me when I say I thought they would be very simple, BUT...)
#1- when I say stop you have to take your foot off the pedal.
#2- your not allowed in the forest or in the ditch
#3- no crashing
#4- only on slow speed.. no touching the yellow fast button
#5- stay in your yard
Ok so these all seem very simple right?... Yeah right..lol Every time he gets in a pickle he keeps his foot on the pedal. Even in reverse. I have moment of OH MY GOSH!!! and other of laughing so hard. Tonight the little booger decided he would push the yellow fast button and he went flying so fast and it scared me, because he is so focused he doesn't take his foot off the gas and keeps going, it's almost like he forgets what to do... awwww the joys! He did do better today than yesterday thought so I do have faith that my son will master my rules soon.
On other news we did our taxes... being self employed is really poopy come tax time. It took me a whole day to get everything in order and calculated. Then only to find out I owe the government some cash..lol. I can't really complain too much because it is just under $100, but Steve on the other hand is getting a HUGE return and it was worth the day of number crunching and organizing my receipts!
And to end this post I present you..... Mr. Ty the crash guy!!! Enjoy!
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Monday, April 23, 2007
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Lovely days...
I have a hot date tonight ;-) Steve and I are going to go out for dinner and some shopping (well if I can convince him to come shopping, maybe I'll just leave him in the van after dinner and go shopping..lol)
Pre-kids Steve and I would have our weekly date nights that we assumed we would keep up even once we were parents... HAHAHA!!! It took me almost a year to leave Ty with a sitter and when we tried to plan an in home date night, something would always come up or we were just too tired or hungry to wait until Ty was in bed sleeping.
I may actually do my hair and make-up, shave my legs. ( BIG maybe on the leg shaving, I may run out of time..lol)
I still have no idea where we are going for supper, but I did tell Steve it would be a comfy sit down restaurant. He would be more than happy to bring me to McD's and I ***THINK*** I deserve a little more classy than that ;-) ?!?
My man finally shaved off his caterpillar (WOW WOW!!!, HUBBA HUBBA)... He says it was an accident, that he was trimming it and he screwed up so he had to shave it...but I know deep down he did it for me...lol. He could of at least made up some kind of story about how he did it allll just for me, but NOPE the truth prevailed and the story wasn't as flattering as I would of hoped!!!
___________________________
My main floor is alllll done (well except for the fridge and stove..lol maybe tomorrow?) It feels so nice to have all the extras done. I had 10 GIANT bags at the curb yesterday for pick up. We still need to do a couple dump runs, but it is allll coming together and feels so fresh. My kitchen is too clean and has that whole empty echo thing going on. It reminds me of when we first moved in and actually had room for everything we owned.
I need to buy some blinds or other curtains for the kitchen. The ones I had were custom made by my seamstress and when I washed them last year I put them in the dryer and shrunk them, about 6 months ago I tried to just wash them and stretch them, but they were still too short.. So I finally decided it was time to look for something new!
Today I will work on the basement, I will just clean it and then do a "spring" cleaning in it at some point. I think instead of washing my own carpets this year I will hire someone to do them. About 6 months ago I did them myself and what a job that was. I rather pay someone to get it done than spend a whole day doing it myself.
___________________________
On the house hunting news...
We are still looking and waiting on a quote on a new build. I have found a house plan on-line that I LOVE, LOVE!!! So we are waiting on an estimate of how much. I love all the angles.
There are some changes that I would make to the plan to make it more my own. I want it rectangle, and the kitchen island would be triangle... The window placement would be different as well... We also *want* a completely finished basement, as well as a garage... so I think it will be tooo much. Now it's just a matter of seeing whether it's even affordable and close to our price range.
I found out yesterday that there will be 4 other houses
on the market on our street, I think it would be at our advantage to wait until they are sold to put up ours (assuming we go with the new build). I think we would be able to get more for ours without the competition of the others!!!
Now that I have written a novel, I think it's time for me to get going and start of my basement so that I can ENJOY this beautiful weather we have been getting.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Spring cleaning day 2...
While Ty was in nursery school I decided to try and finish off the kitchen... I scrubbed for a couple hours and I still have the fridge and stove left to do??? (boy cleaning went so much faster pre-kids..lol)
Once Ty got home we went outside for the afternoon and did some yard work. I think I should of tackled the outside while he was gone. Do you know how hard it is to get rid of toys while your child is watching you...lol. I caught him digging through the garbage to get some toys a couple time!!! "mom this is not broken" he would say and run away with the toy.
It's amazing what a couple sunny days and some scrubbing did for my moral. So far so good... 2 good days in a row, I must be on a happy streak :-)
Once Ty got home we went outside for the afternoon and did some yard work. I think I should of tackled the outside while he was gone. Do you know how hard it is to get rid of toys while your child is watching you...lol. I caught him digging through the garbage to get some toys a couple time!!! "mom this is not broken" he would say and run away with the toy.
It's amazing what a couple sunny days and some scrubbing did for my moral. So far so good... 2 good days in a row, I must be on a happy streak :-)
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Ouch...
I am having a much better waiting day. I figured there surely could be something I could do to occupy my time while waiting.
I decided I would do more scrubbing. I have literally spent from 8am until 5pm in my kitchen scrubbing. My hands & fingers hurt, my back is aching, but what a stress reliever it is and instead of being emotional exhausted I am physically tired..lol
Tomorrow I will have at least another few hours in the kitchen finishing up.
I have moved on from nesting to spring cleaning... ;-)
I decided I would do more scrubbing. I have literally spent from 8am until 5pm in my kitchen scrubbing. My hands & fingers hurt, my back is aching, but what a stress reliever it is and instead of being emotional exhausted I am physically tired..lol
Tomorrow I will have at least another few hours in the kitchen finishing up.
I have moved on from nesting to spring cleaning... ;-)
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Sick and tired...
I have been having some bad adoption waiting days... It seems to be the ongoing pattern of this never ending mess of an adoption. I am really trying to calm myself... tell myself that it's what I signed up for. But it doesn't make it any easier to deal with all the stupid circumstances that I cannot change or do anything about.
I get so darn agitated thinking about what this whole adoption process has been. It's been a series of longer that average wait times, with new rules/changes every single area we have been in. It's getting old, it's getting tiresome. I don't have energy to deal with all the emotions of this ongoing roller coaster.
I am sick and tired of it and if our daughter didn't mean the world to me I would quit. I would tell them all that I am done, that they can rip up our dossier throw it in the nearest dumpster so I could just move on with my life without this being the most annoying, disappointing, ridiculous & time consuming, blood pressure rising pile of dog doo that I have ever had to endure. I am sooo sick of it.. Sick of it all!!!
This stress is affecting everything around me. I noticed Ty getting back into old habits. I feel obsessed with "adoption news" again... and just as I was doing soooo good, I found out about the latest development... I just wish it would just all be over and that she would just get home already. ENOUGH!!!
It's been since before Christmas that I thought she would be home. I planned my life around her arrival being "a couple weeks away", I have nested so many times I can even count, I have EVERYTHING ready. I am ready, my family is ready... what more... what more do I have to do for it to flippen happen.
I thought for just once during this process that something would finally go right, that our file in MOI would be normal wait time. That it would just be a matter of time and she would be here... now I have no clue when, I have no idea when she will come home and it's so frustrating to sit here and wait some more. I think of the time I have lost with her and it hurts.
We requested a baby girl as young as possible. I found out about her when she was 2 months old... SHE IS ALMOST 2 years old!!!! All because of bureaucracy and people in Haitian government positions that make rules up as they go along.
When we adopted Ty there was the political unrest when Aristide was ousted. His adoption from proposal at 6 months old to when he came home at 11 months old - was 5.5 months!!!!!!!! AND that was with a delay of a couple months because of the unrest.
The worst thing about all this waiting is I feel guilty when I get frustrated or feel less than "perfect" in waiting. I swear I think everyone in our neighbourhood must think I am full of it about Tamaya... jezzzz even Ty thinks she is imaginary. I feel like a liar when people ask me if she is home... because months and months and months ago I told them it would be soon...Boy will everyone be surprised (including myself) when she actually is part of our family!!!
I am hoping this blog vent will give me a couple days of calmer waiting and that I can get back into a "normal" frame of mind regarding this whole mess. I just want my sanity and life back, I want my happy self to come back and play and just move on.
I get so darn agitated thinking about what this whole adoption process has been. It's been a series of longer that average wait times, with new rules/changes every single area we have been in. It's getting old, it's getting tiresome. I don't have energy to deal with all the emotions of this ongoing roller coaster.
I am sick and tired of it and if our daughter didn't mean the world to me I would quit. I would tell them all that I am done, that they can rip up our dossier throw it in the nearest dumpster so I could just move on with my life without this being the most annoying, disappointing, ridiculous & time consuming, blood pressure rising pile of dog doo that I have ever had to endure. I am sooo sick of it.. Sick of it all!!!
This stress is affecting everything around me. I noticed Ty getting back into old habits. I feel obsessed with "adoption news" again... and just as I was doing soooo good, I found out about the latest development... I just wish it would just all be over and that she would just get home already. ENOUGH!!!
It's been since before Christmas that I thought she would be home. I planned my life around her arrival being "a couple weeks away", I have nested so many times I can even count, I have EVERYTHING ready. I am ready, my family is ready... what more... what more do I have to do for it to flippen happen.
I thought for just once during this process that something would finally go right, that our file in MOI would be normal wait time. That it would just be a matter of time and she would be here... now I have no clue when, I have no idea when she will come home and it's so frustrating to sit here and wait some more. I think of the time I have lost with her and it hurts.
We requested a baby girl as young as possible. I found out about her when she was 2 months old... SHE IS ALMOST 2 years old!!!! All because of bureaucracy and people in Haitian government positions that make rules up as they go along.
When we adopted Ty there was the political unrest when Aristide was ousted. His adoption from proposal at 6 months old to when he came home at 11 months old - was 5.5 months!!!!!!!! AND that was with a delay of a couple months because of the unrest.
The worst thing about all this waiting is I feel guilty when I get frustrated or feel less than "perfect" in waiting. I swear I think everyone in our neighbourhood must think I am full of it about Tamaya... jezzzz even Ty thinks she is imaginary. I feel like a liar when people ask me if she is home... because months and months and months ago I told them it would be soon...Boy will everyone be surprised (including myself) when she actually is part of our family!!!
I am hoping this blog vent will give me a couple days of calmer waiting and that I can get back into a "normal" frame of mind regarding this whole mess. I just want my sanity and life back, I want my happy self to come back and play and just move on.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Have had better days...
I should be cleaning the shack... but instead I am procrastinating and blogging... why you may ask? Because as any of my readers may observe, this is a pattern... my procrastination pattern.
While I am cleaning I will become a mega witch because I will feel overwhelmed by the task at hand and be miserable because I didn't start first thing in the morning,(or kept it up during the week) and every little thing I clean or pick up will be the focus and I will have a few words of *wisdom* to share with Steve and Ty about the mess/lack of tidiness they have added to my already gross home...lol, but once it is all done I will feel great and my family members will forgive me for my less than perfect attitude!!! Ahhhhhh I love my Sunday clean up!
So anywho...enough of my rant! I wanted to share a few up-dates with you all.
Tamaya; We have been in the ministry of interior now for close to 7 weeks. (Haitian immigration) This is a step that is guesstimated to be 2-4 weeks. We we're notified last week that there was a problem. They have added a new step to this process (of course they did, every step of the way they have changed they way they did things... so why would it be a surprise?!?) It has now been rectified so hopefully I will hear that her file is out soon... then it *should* be a week or so and I will be able to go get her! This is really starting to get old. I am a pretty patient person, but enough already.
Steve; My man is still "broken" my new nickname for him is popcorn, 'cause every time he gets up all his old bones pop. He finally got his cat scan results. He has a bulging disk. The plan for him is to be on temporary category at work with light duties until he gets better. He will start receiving cortisone shots in his back. Hopefully it will auto correct itself. If that doesn't work he will require surgery.
He goes back to work on Tuesday. I can't believe he has been home for 6 weeks already. It feels like just yesterday he came back from Afghanistan. I just wish he would have been better so we could have travelled a bit. I am looking forward to getting back into a routine and having some normalcy back in the home.
My dear hubby was so great yesterday. He offered to go do the groceries all by himself...lol. He even wrote the list himself. The only request I had was a bag of pre-made Asian salad. Unfortunately there was none so he decided to buy me a head of cabbage...lol. Yup the man thought it was a pretty nice head of lettuce. It has been the joke around here and I still chuckle when I think of his reaction when I pointed out that it was cabbage, he even had the nerve to argue that it was lettuce...lol Thank you Steve for doing the groceries... ;-)
Ty; Ty is Ty...lol.. The boy is a big ball of energy. I think he needs his sister to come home so he can have a full time playmate.
Last night we we're watching shark tales and they said "rock you" he repeated it and said "Oh oh mom I said a bad word" I explained that it was not a bad word, but he insisted it was... then he said mom " I have to go in a time-out" and he went to the time-out spot. I still had to explain to him numerous times that it was NOT a bad word, he finally believed me. This is coming from a boy that just a few months ago would swear and cuss his mother out while he was upset and in time-outs... fully knowing it was WRONG. He has made such progress since the trauma therapy. I am so proud of him. I finally feel like I am parenting a "normal" child, not a child that is sooooo out of control. I am really enjoying being his mommy and spending so much quality time with him.
Me; I have both good and bad waiting days. Some days I feel like it will never come, that she will be 50 by the time she comes home. Other days I am at a calm place about waiting and keep telling myself that she is sooo worth it.
Like I said previously, it's getting old. (today is a not so good waiting day) It has been over 21 months since we started her adoption. I know it's coming, but man oh man I just want it to be over so I can stop thinking about her and just start parenting her. I often find myself thinking about all the what if's... what if she isn't here soon... will she turn 2 in Haiti? Spend yet another birthday without her mommy and daddy? With my luck the passport printing machine will break down and it will take them 2 years to fix it... because lets face it... that's the way it seems to go. So as you can see I'm started to get bitter.. today is a not so great waiting day.
With all that being said I don't even have anyone to blame... I wish there was someone I could just get upset with and write a nasty letter to... or call and lose it on them.
Unfortunately it's just been a series of events that have been factors in this "extra long" journey. All of our adoption professionals have been wonderful, I know the director is working her tail off to get our kiddos home. I know that all information is passed on as soon as it received and it's just plain and simple.... POOPY!
I know if there was anything anyone could do they would. So many people just want to see her home.
Anyways that was my vent... I'm sure letting it out will help put it out of mind for another few days. I shall go take my frustrations out on my toilet now. My house will be blingin' in no time!!
While I am cleaning I will become a mega witch because I will feel overwhelmed by the task at hand and be miserable because I didn't start first thing in the morning,(or kept it up during the week) and every little thing I clean or pick up will be the focus and I will have a few words of *wisdom* to share with Steve and Ty about the mess/lack of tidiness they have added to my already gross home...lol, but once it is all done I will feel great and my family members will forgive me for my less than perfect attitude!!! Ahhhhhh I love my Sunday clean up!
So anywho...enough of my rant! I wanted to share a few up-dates with you all.
Tamaya; We have been in the ministry of interior now for close to 7 weeks. (Haitian immigration) This is a step that is guesstimated to be 2-4 weeks. We we're notified last week that there was a problem. They have added a new step to this process (of course they did, every step of the way they have changed they way they did things... so why would it be a surprise?!?) It has now been rectified so hopefully I will hear that her file is out soon... then it *should* be a week or so and I will be able to go get her! This is really starting to get old. I am a pretty patient person, but enough already.
Steve; My man is still "broken" my new nickname for him is popcorn, 'cause every time he gets up all his old bones pop. He finally got his cat scan results. He has a bulging disk. The plan for him is to be on temporary category at work with light duties until he gets better. He will start receiving cortisone shots in his back. Hopefully it will auto correct itself. If that doesn't work he will require surgery.
He goes back to work on Tuesday. I can't believe he has been home for 6 weeks already. It feels like just yesterday he came back from Afghanistan. I just wish he would have been better so we could have travelled a bit. I am looking forward to getting back into a routine and having some normalcy back in the home.
My dear hubby was so great yesterday. He offered to go do the groceries all by himself...lol. He even wrote the list himself. The only request I had was a bag of pre-made Asian salad. Unfortunately there was none so he decided to buy me a head of cabbage...lol. Yup the man thought it was a pretty nice head of lettuce. It has been the joke around here and I still chuckle when I think of his reaction when I pointed out that it was cabbage, he even had the nerve to argue that it was lettuce...lol Thank you Steve for doing the groceries... ;-)
Ty; Ty is Ty...lol.. The boy is a big ball of energy. I think he needs his sister to come home so he can have a full time playmate.
Last night we we're watching shark tales and they said "rock you" he repeated it and said "Oh oh mom I said a bad word" I explained that it was not a bad word, but he insisted it was... then he said mom " I have to go in a time-out" and he went to the time-out spot. I still had to explain to him numerous times that it was NOT a bad word, he finally believed me. This is coming from a boy that just a few months ago would swear and cuss his mother out while he was upset and in time-outs... fully knowing it was WRONG. He has made such progress since the trauma therapy. I am so proud of him. I finally feel like I am parenting a "normal" child, not a child that is sooooo out of control. I am really enjoying being his mommy and spending so much quality time with him.
Me; I have both good and bad waiting days. Some days I feel like it will never come, that she will be 50 by the time she comes home. Other days I am at a calm place about waiting and keep telling myself that she is sooo worth it.
Like I said previously, it's getting old. (today is a not so good waiting day) It has been over 21 months since we started her adoption. I know it's coming, but man oh man I just want it to be over so I can stop thinking about her and just start parenting her. I often find myself thinking about all the what if's... what if she isn't here soon... will she turn 2 in Haiti? Spend yet another birthday without her mommy and daddy? With my luck the passport printing machine will break down and it will take them 2 years to fix it... because lets face it... that's the way it seems to go. So as you can see I'm started to get bitter.. today is a not so great waiting day.
With all that being said I don't even have anyone to blame... I wish there was someone I could just get upset with and write a nasty letter to... or call and lose it on them.
Unfortunately it's just been a series of events that have been factors in this "extra long" journey. All of our adoption professionals have been wonderful, I know the director is working her tail off to get our kiddos home. I know that all information is passed on as soon as it received and it's just plain and simple.... POOPY!
I know if there was anything anyone could do they would. So many people just want to see her home.
Anyways that was my vent... I'm sure letting it out will help put it out of mind for another few days. I shall go take my frustrations out on my toilet now. My house will be blingin' in no time!!
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Birthday wishes...
Thank you all for Ty's birthday wishes, both in comment and e-mails ;-)
We had such a beautiful evening. We went to Eastside Mario's for supper. We let the waitress know it was Ty's birthday so they could sing to him. He loved it!!! I didn't know how he would react, but he just took it all in and started to dance as they sang..lol
Then we went over to wal-mart to buy his 4 wheeler.. That's when we both realised that there was no way we could fit the box in the van without putting the seats down (stow and go) but in order to do that we have to empty it out of the stuff (read: JUNK) that we have in the back. SO... within the next couple days I will go buy it. (hopefully alone and have a little me time..lol)
Because of our not thinking, we pretty much let him get a few toys that he picked out, a couple transport dinky cars, a flashlights, a tent and sleeping bag combo and a few other little things.
We came home and had some birthday cake... He was toooo cute. I wasn't going to do the cake thing because usually at the restaurant they do a little cake, but because he had the kids meal they gave him his 3 mini cones and sang to him with those... So a birthday is not a birthday without a cake... so I ran to the grocery store to get cake and ice-cream before coming home. He was tooooo cute. He said " mom this is my best birthday ever" :-) When he refers to his "birthday" he thinks it's all about the cake in the fridge so thank goodness I didn't miss the boat on that one
I have to admit him being aware of his special day and actually knowing what it was all about was pretty cool... I think next year I will organise his first real birthday party. He has had birthday parties but it was the ones with all adults. Next year he could invite his own friends...
Here is a little video of him blowing out his candles... Don't mind the solo singing voice.. apparently Steve doesn't sing..lol
We had such a beautiful evening. We went to Eastside Mario's for supper. We let the waitress know it was Ty's birthday so they could sing to him. He loved it!!! I didn't know how he would react, but he just took it all in and started to dance as they sang..lol
Then we went over to wal-mart to buy his 4 wheeler.. That's when we both realised that there was no way we could fit the box in the van without putting the seats down (stow and go) but in order to do that we have to empty it out of the stuff (read: JUNK) that we have in the back. SO... within the next couple days I will go buy it. (hopefully alone and have a little me time..lol)
Because of our not thinking, we pretty much let him get a few toys that he picked out, a couple transport dinky cars, a flashlights, a tent and sleeping bag combo and a few other little things.
We came home and had some birthday cake... He was toooo cute. I wasn't going to do the cake thing because usually at the restaurant they do a little cake, but because he had the kids meal they gave him his 3 mini cones and sang to him with those... So a birthday is not a birthday without a cake... so I ran to the grocery store to get cake and ice-cream before coming home. He was tooooo cute. He said " mom this is my best birthday ever" :-) When he refers to his "birthday" he thinks it's all about the cake in the fridge so thank goodness I didn't miss the boat on that one
I have to admit him being aware of his special day and actually knowing what it was all about was pretty cool... I think next year I will organise his first real birthday party. He has had birthday parties but it was the ones with all adults. Next year he could invite his own friends...
Here is a little video of him blowing out his candles... Don't mind the solo singing voice.. apparently Steve doesn't sing..lol
Friday, April 13, 2007
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TY!!!
Our big boy is 4 today... WOW!!!He decided to dress himself in this lovely attire... notice the GREAT button job! :-)
YES!!! that sure is a pair of underwear on his head!!! I *think* they are clean... HAHAHA!!!
Ty scored big with a few cheques and some money!!! We decided we would pool all the money together and let him buy something "big" soooo tonight, after his birthday dinner date we are going to bring him shopping to buy a battery operated 3 wheeler. I can't wait to see his reaction!!!
We are heading out now, but thought I would post real quick!!!
p.s.. yes he did change his clothes into something more appropriate, I promise I would never bring him in public dressed like that...lol
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD !!! We love ya
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
What fun...
So just as I thought our house hunting was over, Steve and I decided to go take a second look at the big house. We looked at the cost it would be to replace the upstairs bedroom carpets. We also looked at what we may be putting into it in the next few years and thought that although it needed some work and MAJOR CLEANING, the work could eventually be done over the years and that even even if we build new, the basement and landscaping would be extra, but we would not get the square footage for that price. When we went to see it today and looked past the updating, we thought it was a good, it has many extras... central air, walk in closet with ensuite, paved drive, double tiered deck, double lot, wood burning fireplace, gas fireplace in rec room.... the space was HUGE and has some cool features.So..... we put in our offer with the condition of our home selling. We bid $5000 less than the asking price, which is reasonable and gave a little room to negotiate.
We got a call from our agent tonight and....... it wasn't accepted :-(
There was another bidder, he bid higher ( I assume over asking price) and he had no conditions.
When we arrived at the agents office she did notify us that there was another offer going in tonight as well. So it was no surprise. I certainly wasn't going to start a bidding war, and had no clue what the other guy was going to bring to the table.
I feel confident that it was meant to be and that there is a reason why that was not our home. I still love my teeny, tiny home...lol Our agent still feels we should put our home up with the condition we find something we want to buy, but in all honesty even after checking the other listings nothing is calling out to me... and putting up my house with no motivation is not really doing anything for me!!!
That was enough excitement for the day...lol. At least it's passing the time as we wait for news about the baby :-) Today marks 6 weeks in the ministry of interior. And it ***SHOULD*** take 2-4 weeks..lol It's ok thought, after spending time with her I realised something pretty big. She is worth every second of this wait and when she actually gets home I am the lucky one that will have the honor to parent her!
Monday, April 09, 2007
Sunday, April 08, 2007
House hunting...
We looked at a few houses on Saturday.
The curb appeal and square footage on this one was a bonus, but the inside needed TLC and some updating. All the flooring needed replacing BADLY, the roof and windows would need to be done within the couple years and at the price the house is listed (at the top of our budget) I can't justify putting in more money. Once we factored in the cost of renovations it made NO SENSE.
The next home was slightly cheaper, the square footage was not as much as the 1st, but it had ample room for us... Unfortunately all the "renovations" that were done within the home were done by someone that had NO CLUE?!? The "complete" basement was clearly done by someone that didn't have a level or any common sense... 
The 3rd house we went to see is not yet listed and is the house of an acquaintance of mine. It was actually nice, the changes/reno's we would have considered were minor and inexpensive. Paint and new linoleum in the kitchen... no biggy!!! The basement was almost finished and very well done. We were both actually very impressed. The only problems are that the backyard fence is about 30 feet from the major highway and that the "living" space in the home was not any bigger than mine except it had 3 MINI bedrooms on the main floor. (I've never seen kids rooms so flipping small... her son had a single bed in it.. nothing else... and no place for a dresser. There was no way Ty's set would fit.
I have 2 fair size rooms on the main and 1 in the basement. My basement is also divided more efficiently giving us more usable space. Soooo after careful consideration and some deep thoughts..lol.. that one wasn't THE ONE.
We talked to the agent about building new a block from here. We are still thinking about it as well as are going to call in a contractor for an idea on expanding here and see what comes from that.
In all honesty I must admit right now is not really the time to tackle a move..lol.. or building. Let's face it, we are going to be new parents again and realistically speaking it would not be the right time to moving while I should be "bonding" and who knows when Steve's back will be healed.
He can barely lift Ty right now let alone move a house..lol
I think this is a great opportunity for us to make a plan of action, figure out what we want to do. Then go from there. If we want to plan an addition we can start saving now for it with a plan to do it in 3 years. Or if we want to build start a plan of what we want, perhaps even buy a lot or start looking at lots and plans.
The great news about all this stuff is we also found out we could list our home for double than what we paid 7 years ago... UNREAL eh!
Friday, April 06, 2007
New house???....
Steve is getting the itch. It seems Steve and I go through spurts of wanted to upgrade to a bigger home with more of what we "wish" we had. When we bought this home it was a great starter. We got it dirt cheap, it was newer and in a great neighbourhood. Now we find ourselves wanting more of those extras.
We have a few homes we are going to see tomorrow. I think it will either put us back into reality, or take the plunge. We are looking at a few options. A) move into something else, B) build new, C) look at expanding(adding a second level and gutting the main floor / adding our wants here.
I guess the main goal is to make sense of it all. I feel I am all over the place with it. I love this home, but there is so many things I want to change about it. The kitchen (the cheapest melamine cupboards were installed by the previous owner and I HATE them), we NEED a garage, want a deck, fence, paved driveway... we will have to start putting money in to it soon, new front windows, new furnace/hot water tank....and even if we were to add all those things to it... we would still be lacking the extra square footage. Man oh man..lol
I think I have a plan???!!!!??? you see this blog sometimes helps me put my thoughts together...lol... If we were to call a contractor/architect we can find out if we can eventually add a second floor... then at least we can build the garage this summer with the plan of eventually being able to expand on living space.
Oh well... I guess at some point we will make up our mind and do something..lol For now it's a thought, it may end up turning into something... or we may end up staying put. Who knows!!! Buying this house was scary enough... now thinking bigger (more expensive) is even scarier and so hard to make the right choice. I certainly don't want to be mortgage poor, (not that we would, but the thought is so scary!)
While checking out the market I found my dream home...lol.. I would need to win the lotto... but check this sucker out. CLICK HERE. I girl can dream right!!!
We have a few homes we are going to see tomorrow. I think it will either put us back into reality, or take the plunge. We are looking at a few options. A) move into something else, B) build new, C) look at expanding(adding a second level and gutting the main floor / adding our wants here.
I guess the main goal is to make sense of it all. I feel I am all over the place with it. I love this home, but there is so many things I want to change about it. The kitchen (the cheapest melamine cupboards were installed by the previous owner and I HATE them), we NEED a garage, want a deck, fence, paved driveway... we will have to start putting money in to it soon, new front windows, new furnace/hot water tank....and even if we were to add all those things to it... we would still be lacking the extra square footage. Man oh man..lol
I think I have a plan???!!!!??? you see this blog sometimes helps me put my thoughts together...lol... If we were to call a contractor/architect we can find out if we can eventually add a second floor... then at least we can build the garage this summer with the plan of eventually being able to expand on living space.
Oh well... I guess at some point we will make up our mind and do something..lol For now it's a thought, it may end up turning into something... or we may end up staying put. Who knows!!! Buying this house was scary enough... now thinking bigger (more expensive) is even scarier and so hard to make the right choice. I certainly don't want to be mortgage poor, (not that we would, but the thought is so scary!)
While checking out the market I found my dream home...lol.. I would need to win the lotto... but check this sucker out. CLICK HERE. I girl can dream right!!!
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Laundry... a thing of the past, well for now!!!
I am proud to announce that yesterday my laundry disaster ended!!! I just shot all the laundry in garbage bags, brought them to the dump and bought new!
OK.... well that's not exactly what happened, but it did cross my mind. I did my million loads, folded them all and even put them away.
I got my house back in order and it feels GREAT!!! I even found the time to putter in Tamaya's room and today I went shopping for some last minute things I need for her. I bought her another couple pairs of shoes (the girl needs shoes!!!, many, many shoes!!!..lol), some diaper shirts because she is able to undress and until her "parasites" are taken care of the diaper MUST stay on!!! I bought a waterproof mattress cover for her temporary playpen bed, I have the sheets for it in the dryer as we speak so EVERYTHING is ready for her now... even to the last little detail!!! Now all we need is the baby!!! Our perfect baby!!!
I am so glad I spent the week there...I miss her immensely, but I am so grateful I got to know her. I had so many unanswered questions about her. I was so afraid of "the character" that was often mentioned in my up-dates, but she only needed boundaries and once she knew I meant what I said she was more than ok with it... it even strengthened our bond. She was smaller than I expected. She is just growing into size 2 clothes... so no returning clothes. She actually still fits well in 18 months. Her hair is no longer "scary" she has soft curls and it was so easy to comb through. She is still very snugly... I was afraid she was going to be toooo independent... BUT nope she is a well rounded child and I look forward to her adjustment, our adjustment. I am SOOOO READY!!!
OK.... well that's not exactly what happened, but it did cross my mind. I did my million loads, folded them all and even put them away.
I got my house back in order and it feels GREAT!!! I even found the time to putter in Tamaya's room and today I went shopping for some last minute things I need for her. I bought her another couple pairs of shoes (the girl needs shoes!!!, many, many shoes!!!..lol), some diaper shirts because she is able to undress and until her "parasites" are taken care of the diaper MUST stay on!!! I bought a waterproof mattress cover for her temporary playpen bed, I have the sheets for it in the dryer as we speak so EVERYTHING is ready for her now... even to the last little detail!!! Now all we need is the baby!!! Our perfect baby!!!
I am so glad I spent the week there...I miss her immensely, but I am so grateful I got to know her. I had so many unanswered questions about her. I was so afraid of "the character" that was often mentioned in my up-dates, but she only needed boundaries and once she knew I meant what I said she was more than ok with it... it even strengthened our bond. She was smaller than I expected. She is just growing into size 2 clothes... so no returning clothes. She actually still fits well in 18 months. Her hair is no longer "scary" she has soft curls and it was so easy to comb through. She is still very snugly... I was afraid she was going to be toooo independent... BUT nope she is a well rounded child and I look forward to her adjustment, our adjustment. I am SOOOO READY!!!
Monday, April 02, 2007
Overwhelmed...
Welllll... OH MY GOSH... the house is finally starting to get back to normal. It took me a couple days to feel better, a couple days to tidy up and re-organise and a couple days to catch up on laundry. Today we are going to watch some movies and I will fold my sticken laundry.
I don't think I have ever seen so much dirty laundry in my life. I had to strip all the beds, Steve and Ty's laundry for the week I was gone... my laundry for the week, plus Tamaya's laundry... Steve's Afghanistan laundry. No lie there must of been at least 15-20 loads that I have been plugging away at for the past couple days... now mind you there are a lot of blankets and comforters included in that... but it's not right. I can't wait to get everything back in order so I can get back to my "routine". You know the one that I do a bit everyday....lol
I still have my spring yard work to do and I am ashamed at how my back yard looks... but oh well it will wait until I get the inside of my shack taken care of! (One thing at a time Sue!!!)
Anywho, I need to get some breakfast into me and start today's laundry folding or I will have a nervous breakdown later for not doing it.
So if I don't blog for a few days all is well I'm just trying to work my way back to my clean house and I may even start my spring cleaning before Tamaya comes home!
I don't think I have ever seen so much dirty laundry in my life. I had to strip all the beds, Steve and Ty's laundry for the week I was gone... my laundry for the week, plus Tamaya's laundry... Steve's Afghanistan laundry. No lie there must of been at least 15-20 loads that I have been plugging away at for the past couple days... now mind you there are a lot of blankets and comforters included in that... but it's not right. I can't wait to get everything back in order so I can get back to my "routine". You know the one that I do a bit everyday....lol
I still have my spring yard work to do and I am ashamed at how my back yard looks... but oh well it will wait until I get the inside of my shack taken care of! (One thing at a time Sue!!!)
Anywho, I need to get some breakfast into me and start today's laundry folding or I will have a nervous breakdown later for not doing it.
So if I don't blog for a few days all is well I'm just trying to work my way back to my clean house and I may even start my spring cleaning before Tamaya comes home!
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Haitian cats...
Can you see the little boogers. I know the quality is less than par, but those were our little critter rat friends. Imagine... And my daughter plays in that area... man oh man! I guess I have to stop thinking about it... At least I didn't have a "face to face" encounter with them and they were always at least 5 feet away ;-)
I got a little update of Tamaya. She is doing well since I left, but her little "character" is out, she has learned how to manipulate to get what she wants and everyone there gives in to her fits. If she would scream for a toy the nannies would take the toy away from the other child to give to her. Also the older children would also give her the toys she would scream for... My little princess will have another thing coming when she realises that those behaviors are unacceptable here. She needs structure and rules. I had to put my foot down a few times and she did great... She knew her maman meant what she said and she was much more pleasant because of it!!!
Every time the electricity would come on, the children would scream hooray and throw their arms up in the air...lol Here is a picture from yesterday when the lights went on..lol
Friday, March 30, 2007
awwww this is the life...
Being away from home and in a 3rd world country sucks..lol. I'm not ready to be packing my bags and moving anytime soon. It's amazing how much you appreciate what you have when you see such extreme poverty. If I ever complain again about my tiny house or of any of the luxuries I have, please remind me to check my mental stability and give me a reality check. (even if this consist of a slap upside the head!!!)
When I came in to the airport in Ottawa I scanned the place to see if I could see Ty and Steve. I looked around and couldn't see them.. then all of a sudden I saw my Ty (he looked so much bigger than before I left, maybe it's the "short" pants daddy let him wear...lol) running towards me. We hugged and he told me how much he missed me. Then he asked me if I met his brown mom. I had to tell him that unfortunately once again I couldn't "find" her or get any info about her. I did tell him that I did ask around and let everyone know that if she ever comes around that WE NEED contact for him... at least a picture and some basic info. Since Ty came home I have been trying to get anything about his Haitian family... now that he is asking so many questions it would be so great to be able to give him something. It seems so unfair that I have so much info/ contact for Tamaya and nothing for Ty. I still have hope that someday we will have something.
Steve and Ty did well while I was away. They are both alive and well..lol.. Ty told me yesterday that "daddy was tough". I asked him if I was tough and he said Yeah... so I guess he couldn't of been that mean..lol. Steve's back is still really bad and has not healed any since he came back home. (He is now waiting on cat scan results to see if it will need surgery) Thankfully Ty is at a fairly independent age because had he needed more assistance there was no way I could have left.
I had rented a phone while I was there and I was able to talk with them every other day or so which was nice.
At first I worried about what condition my house would be in when I arrived, but in all honesty when I was on my way home I really didn't care if it would have been at it's worst at least I was home and had all my comforts. (by the way the house was pretty good, but now I have done NOTHING since I got back and I have some catching up to do)
I really miss my sweet Tamaya, I was ok coming home without her just because I knew that my trip was for a reason... to start our bonding. The first couple days I was in awwww just getting to know her, observing her and just enjoying being there with her. I think I was in shock that we were actually together. By day 3-4 my heart started having some major mommy love feelings... and the few days before I left I was in love... The deep in love feelings I feel for Ty. The unconditional mommy love. She is everything and more than I could have wanted. She is a true little girl with such a calm and happy personality. She is gorgeous and simply perfect in every way. I can't wait to introduce her to my family and friends so they can meet my perfect little angel.
She looked the same she did last year when I went, she was just a little taller. From the pictures I was receiving she looked so different, but she was the same, just taller (but she was shorter than I expected), walking, running, had a mouthful of teeth...lol The first thing I noticed when I held her for the first time was she smelled the same. Her smell was so nice... it must be the cream they use.
Ahhhhh how I hope we get news soon so that she can come home and bless our home, meet her papa and brother and that I can move on with me life and my family of 4!!!
When I came in to the airport in Ottawa I scanned the place to see if I could see Ty and Steve. I looked around and couldn't see them.. then all of a sudden I saw my Ty (he looked so much bigger than before I left, maybe it's the "short" pants daddy let him wear...lol) running towards me. We hugged and he told me how much he missed me. Then he asked me if I met his brown mom. I had to tell him that unfortunately once again I couldn't "find" her or get any info about her. I did tell him that I did ask around and let everyone know that if she ever comes around that WE NEED contact for him... at least a picture and some basic info. Since Ty came home I have been trying to get anything about his Haitian family... now that he is asking so many questions it would be so great to be able to give him something. It seems so unfair that I have so much info/ contact for Tamaya and nothing for Ty. I still have hope that someday we will have something.
Steve and Ty did well while I was away. They are both alive and well..lol.. Ty told me yesterday that "daddy was tough". I asked him if I was tough and he said Yeah... so I guess he couldn't of been that mean..lol. Steve's back is still really bad and has not healed any since he came back home. (He is now waiting on cat scan results to see if it will need surgery) Thankfully Ty is at a fairly independent age because had he needed more assistance there was no way I could have left.
I had rented a phone while I was there and I was able to talk with them every other day or so which was nice.
At first I worried about what condition my house would be in when I arrived, but in all honesty when I was on my way home I really didn't care if it would have been at it's worst at least I was home and had all my comforts. (by the way the house was pretty good, but now I have done NOTHING since I got back and I have some catching up to do)
I really miss my sweet Tamaya, I was ok coming home without her just because I knew that my trip was for a reason... to start our bonding. The first couple days I was in awwww just getting to know her, observing her and just enjoying being there with her. I think I was in shock that we were actually together. By day 3-4 my heart started having some major mommy love feelings... and the few days before I left I was in love... The deep in love feelings I feel for Ty. The unconditional mommy love. She is everything and more than I could have wanted. She is a true little girl with such a calm and happy personality. She is gorgeous and simply perfect in every way. I can't wait to introduce her to my family and friends so they can meet my perfect little angel.
She looked the same she did last year when I went, she was just a little taller. From the pictures I was receiving she looked so different, but she was the same, just taller (but she was shorter than I expected), walking, running, had a mouthful of teeth...lol The first thing I noticed when I held her for the first time was she smelled the same. Her smell was so nice... it must be the cream they use.
Ahhhhh how I hope we get news soon so that she can come home and bless our home, meet her papa and brother and that I can move on with me life and my family of 4!!!
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Nice to be home...
My Haiti experience March - 2007
WARNING... very long..lol (pictures to follow the story at some point today...)
I enjoyed my time, it was a once in a lifetime trip. I have information that I can give to my daughter that will be cherished I am sure. I really missed the comforts of home. Mainly power, showers, a running toilet. It rained most days and the night left everything damp and humid. My bed always felt wet. There was a smell that was less than desirable, I feel like I can still smell it in my nose and it make me nauseated. My pee-pee bucket in my room was HATED, but I preferred that to the potential of walking to the main house and be greeted by the local rats in the night.
All the comforts of home were greatly miss and of course I was home sick for my Canadian bubble.
I was a great experience to spend time bonding with my sweetie. She is everything and more than I could have ever expected. She was shorter than I expected and her face is so tiny. She has such a wonderful personality always laughing, and is so happy. She was so smart and listened to direction very well. I had to establish a couple ground rules with her to show her some authority, but she still loved me..lol. She has the cutest laugh, she sings away. She loved running around and when I told her no, she had the cutest grin. I got my chance to try and do her hair. I was impressed and it turned out pretty cute. She loved eating, she loved snuggling. She is a true little blessing and I am anxiously awaiting to share her with everyone here.
I am unsure if I have the traveling bug or just a sore gut, but hopefully it will turn out to be nothing… because hopefully very soon my baby girl will make her way home and I will never have to miss her again…because it was damn hard to leave.
Had I had to stay another week I would have opted to stay in a hotel. Or I would have come home for the week. I was done with “roughing” it. It was more than time to be here with Steve and Ty.
Day 1.
I got to the Ottawa airport to catch my first plane. For some reason the “mini” plane was frozen and still needed to be thawed??? It was delayed for close to an hour and I started to fear that I would miss my flight into PAP. Luckily, it arrived just in time. The plane had already started boarding. I met Ruth in the line. What a lovely women. We had been in contact throughout our children’s adoptions and finally met to start our trek to meet our kiddoes. We got on the plane. Got into our comfy first class seats and enjoyed, which seemed like a forever flight, into PAP.
We got outside the doors of the airport to the mob of people. We finally saw Denis, our “driver” and he introduced us to another driver he got to drive us. He was a nice man; we started our journey up to Kenscoff to meet our children. Once we got up to Marijke’s all the children greeted us. I waved to Tamaya and she waved back. She started running towards me and about 2 feet away she screeched and ran in the other direction crying. I was ok with her reaction. I really expect it from the reports I got of her being overwhelmed quickly. We played a bit of ball… then she ran away crying again unsure of me. For about 10 minutes later if she even caught me looking at her, she would cry. I thought for sure it would take a few days for her to warm up to me… BUT… Marijke brought out the cookies and let me feed some to the children and we were the greatest friends thereafter. What wonders snacks did for our bonding. J
A crib was set up in my room, Tamaya feel asleep in my arms that night and it was so nice to look at her and feel her warmth. She is so beautiful and perfect.
Day 2…
When I awoke, all I could see were Tamaya’s little eyes staring at me. She had her dolly I brought for her all snuggled up in her arms. It was too cute.
She was getting her bottom changes and was saying maman, maman. I tried to capture it on video with no success. As soon as I brought the camera out she stopped.
We had our breakfast together, then it was time for her “school” I tried to convince her to hang out with me but she really wanted to go. An hour or so later I peaked in on her and called her name. She said “maman, maman” and come running into my arms. What a feeling that was. I stayed with her a little while at “school” It was so nice to see her painting and playing. He teacher is a really nice women and she is so soft with the children.
I am in awww of her. She is going to fit in just perfectly at home. She is so great!!!
Tamaya’s mom came to Marijke’s for some money so that her children can write an exam for school. She had no idea I was there. We had a meeting together and made plans to go visit her and her family on Sunday. I could not believe I would visit her home. The place where my baby girl was born and could have been raised.
Day 3…
Today Ruth and I are going to go to Port au prince and meet up with Margarette. She is the director of the orphanage. I am hoping I will find out news on any progress as well as see if I can find some information on Ty’s birth family. I am also bringing an album of Ty in hopes that his mom will come get it at some point.
Our Driver was late. Apparently, his vehicle overheated on his way up the mountain.
We arrived at the baby house I tried to see as many baby’s as possible and take pictures for waiting parents. I probably forgot some, but I did the best I could. Margarette was not there yet and was called to see when she would arrive. Ruth and I sat for a while and waited and she arrived. I thanked her for coming to see us and explained my reason for being there. She was more than ok that I was there to visit. I showed her pictures of Ty and of course she thought he was gorgeous J I asked her if there was anyone or anyhow to expedite our file and unfortunately she did not have any contacts in that department. She did suggest I visit the woman at the Canadian embassy and see if she would call the ministry of interior. I thought it was worth a shot! We then headed to the big kid house to get some pictures of the children there as well. After our picture taking, we headed to the Canadian embassy. A guard that let us in greeted us. Then another gate, then security check only to be told to pick up a phone in the main lobby to be told NO.. she was no able to help us… It was worth a shot though.
Day 4…
We headed up the mountain to Marijke’s new construction. It was about an hour further up the mountain than her place. The drop off’s where endless. I am scared of heights, but these heights brought on a completely new meaning to fear of height. Holly molly it was not right. The roads going up where very bad, but we did make it and saw the construction, which was pretty cool. She will have a baby house, a couple school rooms and her home.
We went a mile or so further and visited a school. The children asked me questions in French. The main question was if I would bring them home with me… One little girl was too cute and so social. She kept on asking over and over… even after being told it was near impossible.
We drove up to the next school to see the children and it started raining. The children were all crammed in a small class room writing a test. We didn’t stay very long, but it was quite different.
We headed back down the mountain and headed to Mission Baptist a restaurant with souvenirs. I had told Ty I would buy him some maracas and wanted to make sure I had some with me when I came home. I was craving fries, but of course they were out (go figure) so I settled for a sub. It was so nice to have “real” food. The rice and bean thing was getting old. We started our shopping and I managed to find some books, a couple coloring book, and handbag that had some pretty embroidery of a tap-tap on it. There were no maracas inside so we headed to the outside market were we were met by the mob of vendors all looking for us to buy something from them. I only had one thing on my mind and finally at the last hut I found some maracas. I bought 4 of them for 8 US.. ;-)
We then went to the gas station to ensure we had enough gas to get to Robin where Tamaya’s Haitian family lives and also went to the grocery store to buy some groceries for her family. I thought it would be well used and appreciated.
I bought some dish soap, laundry soap, laundry soap bar, toothpaste, big bag of rice, of couple types of beans, soap, shampoo, balloons, balls, chicken bouillon, ketchup, spaghetti, cornmeal, 18 eggs, coffee, powdered milk, cookies, bread, peanut butter, grape jelly, cooking oil, hand cream, candles and toilet paper.
Day 5…
We got in to the vehicle, Tamaya was very unsure of it, probably the first time she has been in a vehicle and outside the gate of Marijke’s house. She cried a bit, but with a little bit of coaxing and assurance she managed to do great. We headed up the mountain on a very narrow and steep hill. The road was very bad. It had rained a lot the last few days making the holes full of water and in some places very muddy.
We arrived in the general area of where her Haitian family lived and asked around to see where her home was. We were pointed to a location, parked and got out. I immediately recognized her younger sibling and we went over to say Hi! Her Haitian mom was not there and we got the all the children together to take pictures. We took pictures of the home and were being checked out by the whole neighborhood. Her mom came to the house, and walked past us to the back. Marijke explained that she was probably going to put her stuff away. After a few moments Marijke went to talk with her and we found out we were at the wrong house, that it was her father in laws place. We went to the back to her place. Marijke got help from the boys to bring in the groceries. We were invited in. It was a very small, unmaintained cement home. It appeared to have 3 rooms. In the main room was a table, a bed and some kitchen stuff. I could that the back rooms also had beds. The scene was from a world vision commercial and I know that this place was better than some. The children were wearing rags, there shoes were falling apart, some had no shoes on. Some of the local children were half-naked and dirty. One little girl had some kind of infection all over her legs. I didn’t know how to react. Half of me just wanted to get into a little ball and cry. It should not be that way… no one should have to live like that. Despite the poverty they were happy thought. The little girl sang for us. I was told by one of the neighbors that she had breastfed Tamaya while her Haitian mom was working, which I found quite strange, but at least she had nourishment. She also gave me crap because Tamaya was sucking her thumb and looked at me as thought I was a bad mom because of it. Marijke’s quickly jumped at my defense and told her it was ok because she is clean. I guess it is a no, no in Haiti to be a thumb sucker..or at least a no no to this lady.
We went outside, the smell in the house was musty and outside was no better. The sun was out and starting to dry things up, but the smell of fesses was in the air. The children played with the balls and balloons. We got the family together to take some final pictures. I really wanted to have Chantaline in the pictures, but she wanted to be in my arms and would scream when I tried to put her in her Haitian mom’s arms, finally I got the snacks out and convinced her to stay long enough to get a couple pictures taken. I know that some day the pictures will be priceless.
As we were leaving I couldn’t help but think of what her life could have been. Would she have been as healthy? Would she had made it? Would she have looked sick like the little boy 2 weeks younger than her? I was grateful that I could provide so much more for her. I was grateful that I had my home, my life, my security…It was an experience I will never forget… ever.
As we were driving down the mountain we met up with my friends son’s birth father. He was invited to come to the house before 4. What a great coincidence, as we were unsure if she would have a chance to meet him.
Sunday night…
We walked over to a restaurant in Kenscoff, everyone in the town said hello and were very friendly. I didn’t know what to expect. I “thought” we were going to go into some little dive that I would later regret. When we walked in I was both shocked and amazed. It was so elegant, The tables were set just right, a Haitian band was playing the ambiance was soothing. I ordered a pepper steak (well done). There was a salad bar included and I tried a bit of everything. There were certainly different flavors… There was a plantain salad I was not too fond of, but the rest was ok. My steak was good. We made room for some awesome desert and enjoyed them so. One was a caramel something and the other a cream something… the cream one was probably the best desert I had ever had.
We walked back home in the rain. Rain, rain, rain. It rained almost every afternoon. L My friends birthdad was there and he was told to came back the next day. He had waited the whole time we were gone.
Day 6…
Ruth’s birthfamily came to the house. It was so nice to see another birthfamily experience. He was very grateful for the rice and snacks she gave him. Marijke gave them each a plate of food to eat. It was their first meal of the day. I showed them pictures of here and explained that his Haitian son would have a very similar life. The father was very respectful, he made sure all his children and wife ate before him and he even gave ½ his meal to his older son to finish. He thanked and hugged Ruth and was very happy that his son would be going to be part of her family.
I bought candies for all the staff at Marijke’s a Tamaya helped me pass them out. It was too cute. She was so proud to give them all to them.
For supper we had a Haitian soup. Jambou… or jamou.. something like that. It is a Haitian soup they usually make every new year to celebrate their independence. It was VERY good.
Day 7.
We had called our driver to come at 9. I was up before the light of day. I kept looking at my princess thinking it SUCKED that I had to leave, but yet I was really looking forward to coming home. I got myself packed and ready. Ruth had already been packed for days..lol ;-) Our driver showed up just on time. I had almost wished he would have been late this time, but I knew that I would have to say good-bye. I gave her some snuggles, hugs and kisses and told her I would be back soon. It was really hard to leave her. I gave her a final kiss as I cried my tears and got in the vehicle. I looked back and Marijke was holding both kids and they waved as we left.
We made our way back to PAP to the baby house. I needed to take some pictures for a friend. I was hoping to see Margarette and to ask her if my file had seen any progress, but she wasn’t there. I knew the mission team was in town and was hoping I would have a chance to say Hi to a couple people. I had a nice chat with a couple ladies that are volunteering in Haiti… then we headed to the big kid house to see the mission team. We said a quick Hi. I got to meet Krissy’s husband. He was hard at work and we headed for the airport.
Our luggage was quickly taken by a few men that wanted to “help” us. I figured I would just pay the stinken tip and have their assistance. I knew it was NOT necessary to have 3 men carry them and we did say we were only going to pay one, but oh well.
While I was in line, I met a RCMP that was training the Haitian police with the UN. It was pretty cool to meet him. He seemed like a great man and was anxiously waiting to go home and be with his wife. It made me miss my hubby so much.
I was so happy to be on the plane… actually, I was even happier to land. It was a long week. When I landed in Montreal it wasn’t much time before I got on to the mini plan to get to Ottawa… I was greeted by my very happy son and hubby… our first stop was to Wendy’s for a burger.
I am tired, my gut hurts and I am enjoying spending time with Steve and Ty… I enjoy my hydro, phone, my flushing toilet, my real coffee, everything.. Just enjoying everything. And Steve did that for 6 months… My hat goes off to him because I couldn’t do it.
WARNING... very long..lol (pictures to follow the story at some point today...)
I enjoyed my time, it was a once in a lifetime trip. I have information that I can give to my daughter that will be cherished I am sure. I really missed the comforts of home. Mainly power, showers, a running toilet. It rained most days and the night left everything damp and humid. My bed always felt wet. There was a smell that was less than desirable, I feel like I can still smell it in my nose and it make me nauseated. My pee-pee bucket in my room was HATED, but I preferred that to the potential of walking to the main house and be greeted by the local rats in the night.
All the comforts of home were greatly miss and of course I was home sick for my Canadian bubble.
I was a great experience to spend time bonding with my sweetie. She is everything and more than I could have ever expected. She was shorter than I expected and her face is so tiny. She has such a wonderful personality always laughing, and is so happy. She was so smart and listened to direction very well. I had to establish a couple ground rules with her to show her some authority, but she still loved me..lol. She has the cutest laugh, she sings away. She loved running around and when I told her no, she had the cutest grin. I got my chance to try and do her hair. I was impressed and it turned out pretty cute. She loved eating, she loved snuggling. She is a true little blessing and I am anxiously awaiting to share her with everyone here.
I am unsure if I have the traveling bug or just a sore gut, but hopefully it will turn out to be nothing… because hopefully very soon my baby girl will make her way home and I will never have to miss her again…because it was damn hard to leave.
Had I had to stay another week I would have opted to stay in a hotel. Or I would have come home for the week. I was done with “roughing” it. It was more than time to be here with Steve and Ty.
Day 1.
I got to the Ottawa airport to catch my first plane. For some reason the “mini” plane was frozen and still needed to be thawed??? It was delayed for close to an hour and I started to fear that I would miss my flight into PAP. Luckily, it arrived just in time. The plane had already started boarding. I met Ruth in the line. What a lovely women. We had been in contact throughout our children’s adoptions and finally met to start our trek to meet our kiddoes. We got on the plane. Got into our comfy first class seats and enjoyed, which seemed like a forever flight, into PAP.
We got outside the doors of the airport to the mob of people. We finally saw Denis, our “driver” and he introduced us to another driver he got to drive us. He was a nice man; we started our journey up to Kenscoff to meet our children. Once we got up to Marijke’s all the children greeted us. I waved to Tamaya and she waved back. She started running towards me and about 2 feet away she screeched and ran in the other direction crying. I was ok with her reaction. I really expect it from the reports I got of her being overwhelmed quickly. We played a bit of ball… then she ran away crying again unsure of me. For about 10 minutes later if she even caught me looking at her, she would cry. I thought for sure it would take a few days for her to warm up to me… BUT… Marijke brought out the cookies and let me feed some to the children and we were the greatest friends thereafter. What wonders snacks did for our bonding. J
A crib was set up in my room, Tamaya feel asleep in my arms that night and it was so nice to look at her and feel her warmth. She is so beautiful and perfect.
Day 2…
When I awoke, all I could see were Tamaya’s little eyes staring at me. She had her dolly I brought for her all snuggled up in her arms. It was too cute.
She was getting her bottom changes and was saying maman, maman. I tried to capture it on video with no success. As soon as I brought the camera out she stopped.
We had our breakfast together, then it was time for her “school” I tried to convince her to hang out with me but she really wanted to go. An hour or so later I peaked in on her and called her name. She said “maman, maman” and come running into my arms. What a feeling that was. I stayed with her a little while at “school” It was so nice to see her painting and playing. He teacher is a really nice women and she is so soft with the children.
I am in awww of her. She is going to fit in just perfectly at home. She is so great!!!
Tamaya’s mom came to Marijke’s for some money so that her children can write an exam for school. She had no idea I was there. We had a meeting together and made plans to go visit her and her family on Sunday. I could not believe I would visit her home. The place where my baby girl was born and could have been raised.
Day 3…
Today Ruth and I are going to go to Port au prince and meet up with Margarette. She is the director of the orphanage. I am hoping I will find out news on any progress as well as see if I can find some information on Ty’s birth family. I am also bringing an album of Ty in hopes that his mom will come get it at some point.
Our Driver was late. Apparently, his vehicle overheated on his way up the mountain.
We arrived at the baby house I tried to see as many baby’s as possible and take pictures for waiting parents. I probably forgot some, but I did the best I could. Margarette was not there yet and was called to see when she would arrive. Ruth and I sat for a while and waited and she arrived. I thanked her for coming to see us and explained my reason for being there. She was more than ok that I was there to visit. I showed her pictures of Ty and of course she thought he was gorgeous J I asked her if there was anyone or anyhow to expedite our file and unfortunately she did not have any contacts in that department. She did suggest I visit the woman at the Canadian embassy and see if she would call the ministry of interior. I thought it was worth a shot! We then headed to the big kid house to get some pictures of the children there as well. After our picture taking, we headed to the Canadian embassy. A guard that let us in greeted us. Then another gate, then security check only to be told to pick up a phone in the main lobby to be told NO.. she was no able to help us… It was worth a shot though.
Day 4…
We headed up the mountain to Marijke’s new construction. It was about an hour further up the mountain than her place. The drop off’s where endless. I am scared of heights, but these heights brought on a completely new meaning to fear of height. Holly molly it was not right. The roads going up where very bad, but we did make it and saw the construction, which was pretty cool. She will have a baby house, a couple school rooms and her home.
We went a mile or so further and visited a school. The children asked me questions in French. The main question was if I would bring them home with me… One little girl was too cute and so social. She kept on asking over and over… even after being told it was near impossible.
We drove up to the next school to see the children and it started raining. The children were all crammed in a small class room writing a test. We didn’t stay very long, but it was quite different.
We headed back down the mountain and headed to Mission Baptist a restaurant with souvenirs. I had told Ty I would buy him some maracas and wanted to make sure I had some with me when I came home. I was craving fries, but of course they were out (go figure) so I settled for a sub. It was so nice to have “real” food. The rice and bean thing was getting old. We started our shopping and I managed to find some books, a couple coloring book, and handbag that had some pretty embroidery of a tap-tap on it. There were no maracas inside so we headed to the outside market were we were met by the mob of vendors all looking for us to buy something from them. I only had one thing on my mind and finally at the last hut I found some maracas. I bought 4 of them for 8 US.. ;-)
We then went to the gas station to ensure we had enough gas to get to Robin where Tamaya’s Haitian family lives and also went to the grocery store to buy some groceries for her family. I thought it would be well used and appreciated.
I bought some dish soap, laundry soap, laundry soap bar, toothpaste, big bag of rice, of couple types of beans, soap, shampoo, balloons, balls, chicken bouillon, ketchup, spaghetti, cornmeal, 18 eggs, coffee, powdered milk, cookies, bread, peanut butter, grape jelly, cooking oil, hand cream, candles and toilet paper.
Day 5…
We got in to the vehicle, Tamaya was very unsure of it, probably the first time she has been in a vehicle and outside the gate of Marijke’s house. She cried a bit, but with a little bit of coaxing and assurance she managed to do great. We headed up the mountain on a very narrow and steep hill. The road was very bad. It had rained a lot the last few days making the holes full of water and in some places very muddy.
We arrived in the general area of where her Haitian family lived and asked around to see where her home was. We were pointed to a location, parked and got out. I immediately recognized her younger sibling and we went over to say Hi! Her Haitian mom was not there and we got the all the children together to take pictures. We took pictures of the home and were being checked out by the whole neighborhood. Her mom came to the house, and walked past us to the back. Marijke explained that she was probably going to put her stuff away. After a few moments Marijke went to talk with her and we found out we were at the wrong house, that it was her father in laws place. We went to the back to her place. Marijke got help from the boys to bring in the groceries. We were invited in. It was a very small, unmaintained cement home. It appeared to have 3 rooms. In the main room was a table, a bed and some kitchen stuff. I could that the back rooms also had beds. The scene was from a world vision commercial and I know that this place was better than some. The children were wearing rags, there shoes were falling apart, some had no shoes on. Some of the local children were half-naked and dirty. One little girl had some kind of infection all over her legs. I didn’t know how to react. Half of me just wanted to get into a little ball and cry. It should not be that way… no one should have to live like that. Despite the poverty they were happy thought. The little girl sang for us. I was told by one of the neighbors that she had breastfed Tamaya while her Haitian mom was working, which I found quite strange, but at least she had nourishment. She also gave me crap because Tamaya was sucking her thumb and looked at me as thought I was a bad mom because of it. Marijke’s quickly jumped at my defense and told her it was ok because she is clean. I guess it is a no, no in Haiti to be a thumb sucker..or at least a no no to this lady.
We went outside, the smell in the house was musty and outside was no better. The sun was out and starting to dry things up, but the smell of fesses was in the air. The children played with the balls and balloons. We got the family together to take some final pictures. I really wanted to have Chantaline in the pictures, but she wanted to be in my arms and would scream when I tried to put her in her Haitian mom’s arms, finally I got the snacks out and convinced her to stay long enough to get a couple pictures taken. I know that some day the pictures will be priceless.
As we were leaving I couldn’t help but think of what her life could have been. Would she have been as healthy? Would she had made it? Would she have looked sick like the little boy 2 weeks younger than her? I was grateful that I could provide so much more for her. I was grateful that I had my home, my life, my security…It was an experience I will never forget… ever.
As we were driving down the mountain we met up with my friends son’s birth father. He was invited to come to the house before 4. What a great coincidence, as we were unsure if she would have a chance to meet him.
Sunday night…
We walked over to a restaurant in Kenscoff, everyone in the town said hello and were very friendly. I didn’t know what to expect. I “thought” we were going to go into some little dive that I would later regret. When we walked in I was both shocked and amazed. It was so elegant, The tables were set just right, a Haitian band was playing the ambiance was soothing. I ordered a pepper steak (well done). There was a salad bar included and I tried a bit of everything. There were certainly different flavors… There was a plantain salad I was not too fond of, but the rest was ok. My steak was good. We made room for some awesome desert and enjoyed them so. One was a caramel something and the other a cream something… the cream one was probably the best desert I had ever had.
We walked back home in the rain. Rain, rain, rain. It rained almost every afternoon. L My friends birthdad was there and he was told to came back the next day. He had waited the whole time we were gone.
Day 6…
Ruth’s birthfamily came to the house. It was so nice to see another birthfamily experience. He was very grateful for the rice and snacks she gave him. Marijke gave them each a plate of food to eat. It was their first meal of the day. I showed them pictures of here and explained that his Haitian son would have a very similar life. The father was very respectful, he made sure all his children and wife ate before him and he even gave ½ his meal to his older son to finish. He thanked and hugged Ruth and was very happy that his son would be going to be part of her family.
I bought candies for all the staff at Marijke’s a Tamaya helped me pass them out. It was too cute. She was so proud to give them all to them.
For supper we had a Haitian soup. Jambou… or jamou.. something like that. It is a Haitian soup they usually make every new year to celebrate their independence. It was VERY good.
Day 7.
We had called our driver to come at 9. I was up before the light of day. I kept looking at my princess thinking it SUCKED that I had to leave, but yet I was really looking forward to coming home. I got myself packed and ready. Ruth had already been packed for days..lol ;-) Our driver showed up just on time. I had almost wished he would have been late this time, but I knew that I would have to say good-bye. I gave her some snuggles, hugs and kisses and told her I would be back soon. It was really hard to leave her. I gave her a final kiss as I cried my tears and got in the vehicle. I looked back and Marijke was holding both kids and they waved as we left.
We made our way back to PAP to the baby house. I needed to take some pictures for a friend. I was hoping to see Margarette and to ask her if my file had seen any progress, but she wasn’t there. I knew the mission team was in town and was hoping I would have a chance to say Hi to a couple people. I had a nice chat with a couple ladies that are volunteering in Haiti… then we headed to the big kid house to see the mission team. We said a quick Hi. I got to meet Krissy’s husband. He was hard at work and we headed for the airport.
Our luggage was quickly taken by a few men that wanted to “help” us. I figured I would just pay the stinken tip and have their assistance. I knew it was NOT necessary to have 3 men carry them and we did say we were only going to pay one, but oh well.
While I was in line, I met a RCMP that was training the Haitian police with the UN. It was pretty cool to meet him. He seemed like a great man and was anxiously waiting to go home and be with his wife. It made me miss my hubby so much.
I was so happy to be on the plane… actually, I was even happier to land. It was a long week. When I landed in Montreal it wasn’t much time before I got on to the mini plan to get to Ottawa… I was greeted by my very happy son and hubby… our first stop was to Wendy’s for a burger.
I am tired, my gut hurts and I am enjoying spending time with Steve and Ty… I enjoy my hydro, phone, my flushing toilet, my real coffee, everything.. Just enjoying everything. And Steve did that for 6 months… My hat goes off to him because I couldn’t do it.
Saturday, March 24, 2007
safe and sound
I just wanted to write a quick message to let everyone know everything is GREAT. My daughter is so beautiful and everything and more than I expected. I am still unsure of whether she is coming home with me.. we still haven't received any news on advancement.
Tomorrow we are going to visit her birthmom's home as well as her 7 sibblings up in the mountains. This experience is so surreal and I am having such a wonderful time :-)
Until next time,
Sue ( a momma in awwwww of her baby!!!)
Tomorrow we are going to visit her birthmom's home as well as her 7 sibblings up in the mountains. This experience is so surreal and I am having such a wonderful time :-)
Until next time,
Sue ( a momma in awwwww of her baby!!!)
Monday, March 19, 2007
IQ test...
Last night was a fun night for Steve and I... it was a battle of the sexes and intelligence. A test the nation IQ test was conducted and was pretty cool. Steve and I did paper and pen testing, but they do have the test on-line. CLICK HERE to see how you fare out. I would love for you to comment your score :-)
Last night both Steve and I were of "average" intelligence which I kind of figured..lol. But *I* did score a few points higher then him. :-) However this morning when I took the test again, knowing the answers I was above average..lol.. I think I prefer that!!! :-) even if it's all in my head. I know for certain I have a few readers that will certainly naturally come in above average!
Last night both Steve and I were of "average" intelligence which I kind of figured..lol. But *I* did score a few points higher then him. :-) However this morning when I took the test again, knowing the answers I was above average..lol.. I think I prefer that!!! :-) even if it's all in my head. I know for certain I have a few readers that will certainly naturally come in above average!
Tomorrow at this time...
In less than 24 hours from now I will be starting my journey... WOW!!! I am freaking out here ;-)... My gut is excited, nervous, anxious, happy. I am going through so many emotions. I'm feeling the same way I did the last time I cancelled my trip thinking it was a "bad gut feeling".
These feeling are throwing my whole body off... maybe it's my blood pressure? I just need to breath....lol!!! I'm sure once I start my trek I will be fine. Once I get to my destination and have Tamaya in my arms I will feel 100 times better..lol
This time I'm not feeling like anything bad will happen and am obviously going. (I am certainly NOT going to Google Haiti kidnapping on-line news this time..lol, I'm sure last time that just added insult to injury, I did hear from numerous people that the kidnappings have declined quite a bit.)
Haiti for me is so unbelievable. It's my children's birth country therefore I will always feel like it is part of our lives. It is certainly a country that has many hardships, but despite the poverty there is so much beauty. The people I met were just so beautiful, both inside and out. They were so full of life despite their circumstances. Everyone seems to have a smile on their face. The sounds in the distance are of Haitian music and people laughing. You see farm animals everywhere. Women carrying buckets of things on their head while walking. You hear laughter of children everywhere. It's a very simple life, but a beautiful one. The wonderful Haitian people that I have met and grown to love, live for the moment. They do what they can with what they have.
Last year while I was there, Marijke and I were walking in the village and went over to one of her staff's house to say hello, bring her a gift and see her new baby. She was home after delivering her baby a couple weeks prior. She was so very proud of her home. A 3 room home with a kitchen, bedroom and living room/bedroom. Her home looked like a mishmash of hardware stuck together. Her home was smaller then my parents camper and I beleive she has 4 children(?)... she was so proud of it. Marijke later confirm that it certainly was one of the nicer homes.
While walking in the village every one said hello... everyone, asked "how are you today?" Everyone had a smile.
As we walked further through the village just up the road was a ravine that was down a hill and there was a dozen or so ladies chit-chatting and doing their laundry. It was their "social" gathering. The women get together, do laundry, gossip and then go home..lol.
I am looking forward to another Haiti experience, Haiti has a way of slapping you upside the head and making you ask yourself some pretty hard questions... like...
What in the world do you have to complain about?, or Why in the world would I feel like you need more of this or that? It really makes you appreciate all those little things that simply become part of your everyday life that you don't even notice anymore.
These feeling are throwing my whole body off... maybe it's my blood pressure? I just need to breath....lol!!! I'm sure once I start my trek I will be fine. Once I get to my destination and have Tamaya in my arms I will feel 100 times better..lol
This time I'm not feeling like anything bad will happen and am obviously going. (I am certainly NOT going to Google Haiti kidnapping on-line news this time..lol, I'm sure last time that just added insult to injury, I did hear from numerous people that the kidnappings have declined quite a bit.)
Haiti for me is so unbelievable. It's my children's birth country therefore I will always feel like it is part of our lives. It is certainly a country that has many hardships, but despite the poverty there is so much beauty. The people I met were just so beautiful, both inside and out. They were so full of life despite their circumstances. Everyone seems to have a smile on their face. The sounds in the distance are of Haitian music and people laughing. You see farm animals everywhere. Women carrying buckets of things on their head while walking. You hear laughter of children everywhere. It's a very simple life, but a beautiful one. The wonderful Haitian people that I have met and grown to love, live for the moment. They do what they can with what they have.
Last year while I was there, Marijke and I were walking in the village and went over to one of her staff's house to say hello, bring her a gift and see her new baby. She was home after delivering her baby a couple weeks prior. She was so very proud of her home. A 3 room home with a kitchen, bedroom and living room/bedroom. Her home looked like a mishmash of hardware stuck together. Her home was smaller then my parents camper and I beleive she has 4 children(?)... she was so proud of it. Marijke later confirm that it certainly was one of the nicer homes.
While walking in the village every one said hello... everyone, asked "how are you today?" Everyone had a smile.
As we walked further through the village just up the road was a ravine that was down a hill and there was a dozen or so ladies chit-chatting and doing their laundry. It was their "social" gathering. The women get together, do laundry, gossip and then go home..lol.
I am looking forward to another Haiti experience, Haiti has a way of slapping you upside the head and making you ask yourself some pretty hard questions... like...
What in the world do you have to complain about?, or Why in the world would I feel like you need more of this or that? It really makes you appreciate all those little things that simply become part of your everyday life that you don't even notice anymore.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
3 more sleeps...
I accomplished packing today... I'm just about done. I have a few things that I need to wash/fold to add to my suitcase. What a difference another piece of luggage makes when trying to pack clothes, donations and Tamaya stuff. I have a suitcase full of snacks for the kiddoes, and a couple treats for us ladies. I also have my carry on "mini" suitcase with all Tamaya's homecoming stuff plus toys for her and outfits for there.. I really enjoyed packing it. Then last but not least my clothes one. :-)
Tamaya's suitcase is ready... ready, like really ready to come home and all..I REALLLLLY hope she can come home with me. I'm really trying to be realistic that she may not, but darn it would be so nice to finally see an end to this loooooonnnnnnnnggggggg journey. I know it's possible so I will just keep wishing that it all falls together while I am there.
The "RUBBERMAID" (yup I'm doing a stinking rubbermaid!) is filed. (Monday I am supposed to received the plastic covers for the cotton diapers) My travel partner and I have decided to split the cost between the 2 of us and Marijke was so appreciative.
Marijke is 60ish, she is from the Netherland. She has a foundations that provides schooling to Haitian children. I believe she has started 4-5 schools. She is so amazing, I can't help but smile when I think of what a great soul she is. She opened her home as a "foster parent" to about 20 children because the orphanages were too full from all the longer wait times for the paperwork to be processed. I am truly honored to have become quite close to her throughout Tamaya's adoption. She has been so wonderful at documenting all of Tamaya's milestones. Every time she did anything new and wonderful I would get an e-mail. It was truly priceless to have such a great contact. I never felt like I missed anything. At least with this adoption I can say that I never worried once about my daughters well being. I never worried that she wasn't getting all of her needs met. All the nannies and staff at Marijke's are so nice as well. I'm really looking forward to seeing all the friends I had made last year...
I did nothing other than pack today. Well....the normal everyday stuff. My legs are still hairy, I have a little laundry back-up starting. I am really trying hard not to get overwhelmed. My main goal of packing is at least DONE and now even if the laundry is not finished I really don't care because I won't have to look at it...lol
I really just want to spend the next couple days hanging with Ty and Steve.. the rest is just all minor details..lol.. well except the legs, those need to be done for sure or I will have a major complex considering I have packed mostly skirts and capris..lol
Tamaya's suitcase is ready... ready, like really ready to come home and all..I REALLLLLY hope she can come home with me. I'm really trying to be realistic that she may not, but darn it would be so nice to finally see an end to this loooooonnnnnnnnggggggg journey. I know it's possible so I will just keep wishing that it all falls together while I am there.
The "RUBBERMAID" (yup I'm doing a stinking rubbermaid!) is filed. (Monday I am supposed to received the plastic covers for the cotton diapers) My travel partner and I have decided to split the cost between the 2 of us and Marijke was so appreciative.
Marijke is 60ish, she is from the Netherland. She has a foundations that provides schooling to Haitian children. I believe she has started 4-5 schools. She is so amazing, I can't help but smile when I think of what a great soul she is. She opened her home as a "foster parent" to about 20 children because the orphanages were too full from all the longer wait times for the paperwork to be processed. I am truly honored to have become quite close to her throughout Tamaya's adoption. She has been so wonderful at documenting all of Tamaya's milestones. Every time she did anything new and wonderful I would get an e-mail. It was truly priceless to have such a great contact. I never felt like I missed anything. At least with this adoption I can say that I never worried once about my daughters well being. I never worried that she wasn't getting all of her needs met. All the nannies and staff at Marijke's are so nice as well. I'm really looking forward to seeing all the friends I had made last year...
I did nothing other than pack today. Well....the normal everyday stuff. My legs are still hairy, I have a little laundry back-up starting. I am really trying hard not to get overwhelmed. My main goal of packing is at least DONE and now even if the laundry is not finished I really don't care because I won't have to look at it...lol
I really just want to spend the next couple days hanging with Ty and Steve.. the rest is just all minor details..lol.. well except the legs, those need to be done for sure or I will have a major complex considering I have packed mostly skirts and capris..lol
Friday, March 16, 2007
4 more days...
WOW, I seem to have accomplished so much in the last couple days.
I closed my totals for 2006 for my daycare. I still have some bookkeeping left to do, but at least all my families have their receipts/totals. I just have to total my expenses and I am DONE, once I get home we will file our taxes!!!
I have finished part A of Ty's therapy. I may decide to continue on to B and C... but at least for now I am done with the obligatory in class sessions.. And proud to say I have no lingering homework for the class.
Groceries are done for the week that I will be gone.
My house is still half decent, I still have been *trying* to stick to my daily schedule and it has been working GREAT.
Bills are all paid to ZERO..lol... When it comes to me and our monthly bills and actually paying them I am the worst. ( remember...lol...I don't view money (or bills) as important things in my life.) I get to them every other month. This time we were pushing the 3 month mark and I started getting "THE" calls. It's never been a lack of money, it's pretty much been a matter of time to actually sit there and figure it all out. I could put everything on automatic withdrawal from our account, but then *THEY* would have control of when I pay them..lol I do pay all the "important" ones on time thought, vehicle, mortgage and rarely hold a balance on my credit cards so our credit is not affected.
Besides that I am still HIGH!!!... I am so excited to go be with my baby. Wow. I can't wait to see her again, I know she has changes so much in the past year since my last visit.
I can't wait to hold her. I can't wait to see how she will react to me. I do anticipate some shyness from her. My plan is not to overwhelm her with me presence, but slowly engage in one on one. I really have no grand expectations about our reunion, I certainly want to let her call the shots on how comfortable she is, and I will follow her lead as far as how much interaction she allows in the first couple days.
When I went last year she was unsure of me for the first hug/mommy in awwww tears. It took her a day to smile at me and by day 2 if I was away from her she would look for me. By day 3 if I put her down she would cry... that was my cue to back off. I spend a lot of time just watching her from afar and let her do her own thing. I didn't want her to feel "hurt" when I would no longer be around... or maybe it was for me not to get to close???
I'm going to hit the hay and get some much needed sleep. I have a few things I need to get done tomorrow. I am realllly trying not to procrastinate so I can have a couple days to spend with Ty and Steve before I leave.
TO DO tomorrow...
- completely pack
- shave hairy legs
- dye hair (optional, maybe while shaving legs???? hit 2 birds with one stone..lol)
- give the house a once over
- get her bed made, as well as disinfect/set up playpen.
I closed my totals for 2006 for my daycare. I still have some bookkeeping left to do, but at least all my families have their receipts/totals. I just have to total my expenses and I am DONE, once I get home we will file our taxes!!!
I have finished part A of Ty's therapy. I may decide to continue on to B and C... but at least for now I am done with the obligatory in class sessions.. And proud to say I have no lingering homework for the class.
Groceries are done for the week that I will be gone.
My house is still half decent, I still have been *trying* to stick to my daily schedule and it has been working GREAT.
Bills are all paid to ZERO..lol... When it comes to me and our monthly bills and actually paying them I am the worst. ( remember...lol...I don't view money (or bills) as important things in my life.) I get to them every other month. This time we were pushing the 3 month mark and I started getting "THE" calls. It's never been a lack of money, it's pretty much been a matter of time to actually sit there and figure it all out. I could put everything on automatic withdrawal from our account, but then *THEY* would have control of when I pay them..lol I do pay all the "important" ones on time thought, vehicle, mortgage and rarely hold a balance on my credit cards so our credit is not affected.
Besides that I am still HIGH!!!... I am so excited to go be with my baby. Wow. I can't wait to see her again, I know she has changes so much in the past year since my last visit.
I can't wait to hold her. I can't wait to see how she will react to me. I do anticipate some shyness from her. My plan is not to overwhelm her with me presence, but slowly engage in one on one. I really have no grand expectations about our reunion, I certainly want to let her call the shots on how comfortable she is, and I will follow her lead as far as how much interaction she allows in the first couple days.
When I went last year she was unsure of me for the first hug/mommy in awwww tears. It took her a day to smile at me and by day 2 if I was away from her she would look for me. By day 3 if I put her down she would cry... that was my cue to back off. I spend a lot of time just watching her from afar and let her do her own thing. I didn't want her to feel "hurt" when I would no longer be around... or maybe it was for me not to get to close???
I'm going to hit the hay and get some much needed sleep. I have a few things I need to get done tomorrow. I am realllly trying not to procrastinate so I can have a couple days to spend with Ty and Steve before I leave.
TO DO tomorrow...
- completely pack
- shave hairy legs
- dye hair (optional, maybe while shaving legs???? hit 2 birds with one stone..lol)
- give the house a once over
- get her bed made, as well as disinfect/set up playpen.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Cute Ty...
My son, my son, my son....
We were out today and he saw a very pregnant lady. He said "oh mom, her belly is huge", I explained that she had a baby in her belly. He proceeded to ask "WHY?" I then told him she was pregnant. He went up to her and said " You have a baby in your belly? She answered that yes she was going to have a baby boy. "oh, and is he going to be coming out of your vagina?" I just about died.. What a kid man.
A few days ago he asked me how babies came out. So I thought I would go the honest way... but man oh man.
NOTE TO SELF... Do not leave television on The Learning Channel (baby story) and assume he is watching cartoons... toooo much explaining and a potential embarrassment!!!!
These last few days I swear I have been high on life! High on knowing this beautiful adoption is coming to an end and even more than anything, knowing that just in a few days I will be holding my princess and getting to know her again.
I have been busy collecting donations to bring with me. I really didn't want to bring a Rubbermaid with me, (they are so darn bulky and awkward) but it looks like I will have to bring my 3 luggage max that I was trying to avoid. Marijke is in desperate need of cotton diapers and covers. I have managed to find some and bought 100 inserts and ordered 50 plastic covers that I am really hoping will arrive Monday before I leave. My dentist gave me a couple dozen toothbrushes, I have crib sheets as well as a whole bunch of sippy cups. I have so many other odds and sods that I had previously packed, but will have to somehow pack in order of importance.
My plan is to blog while I am away. I will send Steve my posts by e-mail and he can copy, paste them on to blogger. I really don't know how much actual time I will have on-line so you may get a readers digest version of my activities, but I will be sure to journal my thoughts in detail once I am home. This time there will be no "hitchhiking Haitian style", I am hoping this experience will be less "exciting" than the last..lol
We were out today and he saw a very pregnant lady. He said "oh mom, her belly is huge", I explained that she had a baby in her belly. He proceeded to ask "WHY?" I then told him she was pregnant. He went up to her and said " You have a baby in your belly? She answered that yes she was going to have a baby boy. "oh, and is he going to be coming out of your vagina?" I just about died.. What a kid man.
A few days ago he asked me how babies came out. So I thought I would go the honest way... but man oh man.
NOTE TO SELF... Do not leave television on The Learning Channel (baby story) and assume he is watching cartoons... toooo much explaining and a potential embarrassment!!!!
--------------------------------------------
These last few days I swear I have been high on life! High on knowing this beautiful adoption is coming to an end and even more than anything, knowing that just in a few days I will be holding my princess and getting to know her again.
I have been busy collecting donations to bring with me. I really didn't want to bring a Rubbermaid with me, (they are so darn bulky and awkward) but it looks like I will have to bring my 3 luggage max that I was trying to avoid. Marijke is in desperate need of cotton diapers and covers. I have managed to find some and bought 100 inserts and ordered 50 plastic covers that I am really hoping will arrive Monday before I leave. My dentist gave me a couple dozen toothbrushes, I have crib sheets as well as a whole bunch of sippy cups. I have so many other odds and sods that I had previously packed, but will have to somehow pack in order of importance.
My plan is to blog while I am away. I will send Steve my posts by e-mail and he can copy, paste them on to blogger. I really don't know how much actual time I will have on-line so you may get a readers digest version of my activities, but I will be sure to journal my thoughts in detail once I am home. This time there will be no "hitchhiking Haitian style", I am hoping this experience will be less "exciting" than the last..lol
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
What a wonderful life...
I have been having GREAT days... I'm still in awwww with my new found relationship with Ty. He is no longer feeling the need to lash out and has been perfect. I can't even begin to explain how much *WE* have changed. I am REALLY having fun and loving being his mom again. The therapy was EXACLY what we needed. I am so grateful that this course is available in our little area. I will take some time when I actually have a chance and write a post of the specific things we have done... or find a website with the info...lol.
Steve and I have been hanging out. He is still very sore and I really wish I could take his pain away so he can help around here..lol He doesn't think it's funny though because he is getting tired of it and has guilty feelings about not being to be more active with us... but we do understand and he has been helpful in many ways, just not physically.
I haven't started packing, but I have starting putting thing together to make my packing easier. I am hoping I can find some of those space saver bags to pack some of the clothes donations I have. I also have to pack for Tamaya as thought she will be coming home, but I am hoping it will fit in my carry on. I'm going to bring a size 2 pair of jeans I have for her and if the suckers are too small I will roll em up and make Capri's with them.. worst case scenario if they are super small I will change her into her size 3 p.j.'s for the Canadian cold? I've decided I will wait to return her clothes, just in case they do fit.
Steve is loaning me his MP3 player and has we have been busy finding good tunes. Man oh man... what a job. My hubby has the most interesting taste in music. From Kenny Rogers, to his way to hard metal, (I call it his Devil music) to Air supply, and the police... LOL :-) Whatever works I guess!
I also found out that there is a mission team going to the orphanage at the end of our stay. We may actually stay with them at the hotel the night before leaving. Also, if I stay an extra week I will have the choice to join the team in some activities they have planned. So that's a cool bonus. There are many things I would love to experience in Haiti, but I would never go alone, but with the team I would feel much safer :-)
I better get my butt in gear before another day slips by me without much accomplished!!!! My head is spinning with all this excitement and I end up wasting my day in awwww..lol
Steve and I have been hanging out. He is still very sore and I really wish I could take his pain away so he can help around here..lol He doesn't think it's funny though because he is getting tired of it and has guilty feelings about not being to be more active with us... but we do understand and he has been helpful in many ways, just not physically.
I haven't started packing, but I have starting putting thing together to make my packing easier. I am hoping I can find some of those space saver bags to pack some of the clothes donations I have. I also have to pack for Tamaya as thought she will be coming home, but I am hoping it will fit in my carry on. I'm going to bring a size 2 pair of jeans I have for her and if the suckers are too small I will roll em up and make Capri's with them.. worst case scenario if they are super small I will change her into her size 3 p.j.'s for the Canadian cold? I've decided I will wait to return her clothes, just in case they do fit.
Steve is loaning me his MP3 player and has we have been busy finding good tunes. Man oh man... what a job. My hubby has the most interesting taste in music. From Kenny Rogers, to his way to hard metal, (I call it his Devil music) to Air supply, and the police... LOL :-) Whatever works I guess!
I also found out that there is a mission team going to the orphanage at the end of our stay. We may actually stay with them at the hotel the night before leaving. Also, if I stay an extra week I will have the choice to join the team in some activities they have planned. So that's a cool bonus. There are many things I would love to experience in Haiti, but I would never go alone, but with the team I would feel much safer :-)
I better get my butt in gear before another day slips by me without much accomplished!!!! My head is spinning with all this excitement and I end up wasting my day in awwww..lol
Sunday, March 11, 2007
9 days...
Picture of Tamaya, the little boy in the back is my travel partners little angel. Last year when I went to visit he was just a tiny little baby. I can't beleive how much time has passed since my last visit!WOW, I can hardly beleive I will be holding her very soon. I am so happy I have a plan. It makes me feel so much more in control of my circumstances. The really nice part of all of this is that I really have no expectations. My first choice of course would be for her to fly back with me on the 27th, but I am really ok with having to come home without her, it just makes so much more sense for me to stay that week. Jezzzz I am pretty impressed with my plan A, B & C....lol.
I was also so impressed with Steve's response. I really figured my "penny pinching man" ;-) (this is actually a good quality with a wife that doesn't view money as anything else but paper/metal that always is a available) would NOT want to spend money on another ticket for me going again on the 1 days in and out, Thankfully he saw that it made the most sense.
I will also send the Orphanage director (she is the one that has been processing the paper work) an e-mail letter her know of my plan and offer her any help I can provide. If she needs me to sit in an office all day instead of her doing it when her time is limited I am more than willing to. I am going to make it very clear that I have no intentions of going to undermind or insult her ability to process the papers. I know she has on other occasions got bent out of shape when parents have gone before their children were ready, but I am not going with the intention to bring her home so I hope she is cool with that.
I think today I will start packing, or at least make a list. I am usually such a last minute person READ: PROCRASTINATOR, but I want to make sure I have EVERYTHING! I will have to make sure first thing tomorrow I actually get my blood work done, I want to make sure my I am immune to Hep. I didn't follow the proper shot schedule... so it's just to make sure. I will also have to start my malaria meds. Better to be safe than sorry. Last time I didn't and thankfully I was ok, but you never know... I am such a pill hater, but I guess if I can prevent something it is the wise choice.
Well I should get on with my day and do my "Sunday" cleaning. My shack needs some attentions.
Friday, March 09, 2007
GREAT NEWS...
I have decided that the 20th will be my travel date to Haiti... After much thought and trying to figure everything out it is the week that makes the most sense and it has really just fallen together.
My travel partner is only able to go within the next 2 weeks due to other staff members at her work place already having booked that time off... I am unable to go until the 20th because of Ty's therapy.
Marijke is going back to the Netherlands April 4th and realistically I do not want to be at her house without her.
Ty's Birthday is April 13th and I will not go to Haiti that week and miss his b-day.
Steve goes back to work mid April and I would have to get a sitter for Ty if I was to go to Haiti for a week, while Steve is working.
Sooooooo.... after some thought and a totally on board, loving hubby I am going to go bond with my daughter from the 20th-27th, if she is ready to come back the 27th Yipppeeee, if not, but very close... I will stay an extra week. If she is not close, I will come home without her on the 27th. But because of my time spent with her she will know me and when she is totally ready I would just fly in and out the same day!!!
I'm getting pretty excited to know in just 11 days I will be in Haiti bonding with my sweetie... HOW COOL!!!!
My travel partner is only able to go within the next 2 weeks due to other staff members at her work place already having booked that time off... I am unable to go until the 20th because of Ty's therapy.
Marijke is going back to the Netherlands April 4th and realistically I do not want to be at her house without her.
Ty's Birthday is April 13th and I will not go to Haiti that week and miss his b-day.
Steve goes back to work mid April and I would have to get a sitter for Ty if I was to go to Haiti for a week, while Steve is working.
Sooooooo.... after some thought and a totally on board, loving hubby I am going to go bond with my daughter from the 20th-27th, if she is ready to come back the 27th Yipppeeee, if not, but very close... I will stay an extra week. If she is not close, I will come home without her on the 27th. But because of my time spent with her she will know me and when she is totally ready I would just fly in and out the same day!!!
I'm getting pretty excited to know in just 11 days I will be in Haiti bonding with my sweetie... HOW COOL!!!!
GREAT NEWS...
I have decided that the 20th will be my travel date to Haiti... After much thought and trying to figure everything out it is the week that makes the most sense and it has really just fallen together.
My travel partner is only able to go within the next 2 weeks due to other staff members at her work place already having booked that time off... I am unable to go until the 20th because of Ty's therapy.
Marijke is going back to the Netherlands April 4th and realistically I do not want to be at her house without her.
Ty's Birthday is April 13th and I will not go to Haiti that week and miss his b-day.
Steve goes back to work mid April and I would have to get a sitter for Ty if I was to go to Haiti for a week, while Steve is working.
Sooooooo.... after some thought and a totally on board, loving hubby I am going to go bond with my daughter from the 20th-27th, if she is ready to come back the 27th Yipppeeee, if not, but very close... I will stay an extra week. If she is not close, I will come home without her on the 27th. But because of my time spent with her she will know me and when she is totally ready I would just fly in and out the same day!!!
I'm getting pretty excited to know in just 11 days I will be in Haiti bonding with my sweetie... HOW COOL!!!!
My travel partner is only able to go within the next 2 weeks due to other staff members at her work place already having booked that time off... I am unable to go until the 20th because of Ty's therapy.
Marijke is going back to the Netherlands April 4th and realistically I do not want to be at her house without her.
Ty's Birthday is April 13th and I will not go to Haiti that week and miss his b-day.
Steve goes back to work mid April and I would have to get a sitter for Ty if I was to go to Haiti for a week, while Steve is working.
Sooooooo.... after some thought and a totally on board, loving hubby I am going to go bond with my daughter from the 20th-27th, if she is ready to come back the 27th Yipppeeee, if not, but very close... I will stay an extra week. If she is not close, I will come home without her on the 27th. But because of my time spent with her she will know me and when she is totally ready I would just fly in and out the same day!!!
I'm getting pretty excited to know in just 11 days I will be in Haiti bonding with my sweetie... HOW COOL!!!!
Thursday, March 08, 2007
I realised I had not been on blogging.. it's like I have to share computer time or something..lol
Having Steve home is really nice. We are really getting into the groove of our regular routine. He is off now, which is nice. He went to a doctors appointment yesterday and they did x-rays on his back. He has a slipped disk and it's pinching a nerve in his leg. He starts physiotherapy tomorrow. He will give that a shot, but I think he needs a chiropractor.
I find I tend to procrastinate more when he around, but it has been nice to just sit around with him and really do nothing. We have enjoyed playing some computer games together. We had a bunch of free trial games on our laptop that I didn't know we had. What a piss off. They only give an hour trial and a couple times in the midst of a game, or right at the end of a level it would stop... NOT RIGHT!!! :-) *almost* made me want to buy the full version..lol
I had a hard adoption waiting day today. I kept on thinking of different scenario's and of course fear came into play. I do just have to believe and know that it's coming. Of course when I get consumed by the "unknowns" of when she is coming home I tend to obsess about it and everything around me seems to annoy me. I get antsy and really what will that give me?.. NOTHING. It won't make her come home any faster and in the end it's a wasted day, a waste of energy. The nice thing about life is I get to shake it off and try again and I guess considering my feelings used to be a daily occurrence one day is not all that bad! I am at the last step of her adoption... I just have to be grateful and not worry about the details because in the end they really don't matter. Her homecoming and being a part of our family is the only things that I should have on my mind in regard to the adoption!
Having Steve home is really nice. We are really getting into the groove of our regular routine. He is off now, which is nice. He went to a doctors appointment yesterday and they did x-rays on his back. He has a slipped disk and it's pinching a nerve in his leg. He starts physiotherapy tomorrow. He will give that a shot, but I think he needs a chiropractor.
I find I tend to procrastinate more when he around, but it has been nice to just sit around with him and really do nothing. We have enjoyed playing some computer games together. We had a bunch of free trial games on our laptop that I didn't know we had. What a piss off. They only give an hour trial and a couple times in the midst of a game, or right at the end of a level it would stop... NOT RIGHT!!! :-) *almost* made me want to buy the full version..lol
I had a hard adoption waiting day today. I kept on thinking of different scenario's and of course fear came into play. I do just have to believe and know that it's coming. Of course when I get consumed by the "unknowns" of when she is coming home I tend to obsess about it and everything around me seems to annoy me. I get antsy and really what will that give me?.. NOTHING. It won't make her come home any faster and in the end it's a wasted day, a waste of energy. The nice thing about life is I get to shake it off and try again and I guess considering my feelings used to be a daily occurrence one day is not all that bad! I am at the last step of her adoption... I just have to be grateful and not worry about the details because in the end they really don't matter. Her homecoming and being a part of our family is the only things that I should have on my mind in regard to the adoption!
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
FREEEEZING...
Oh my gosh, it's freezing out there. it's -28 and with the windchill -38... what happened to spring? At least in the midst of the cold there is a nice bright blue sky!
This morning found me up super early. "Joy de vive???" or the wonderful smell of fresh coffee brewing...
I was up just after 6, I decided to shower right away because I seem to get more done when I get that over with. I have a few odds and ends I want to get done today, but most of all I want to spend some time in Tamaya's room packing and preparing. I still haven't reschedule my flight for the 20th. I know realistically it makes more sense to go the week later, however if I find out this week she is out... I may just have to hop on the plane..lol (I will wait until later this week to reschedule :-)
Steve took the van to work today and because of this freezing weather I have decided to keep Ty home from nursery school. Steve's truck hasn't been driven in 6 months and I would hate to have to have to break down in this way too cold weather with Ty.
Ty had a hard time seeing Steve go to work this morning. He was afraid daddy would be gone for a while again. I did explain that he would be home around lunch time which seemed to help him. Poor little guy. I'm sure this must be so confusing for him. But at least once Steve arrives he will see that he came back.
Oh my... My dear hubby is too funny. The other night while we were all at the table eating diner I commented to Steve how nice his tan was. We compared "colour" and he pipes up "you guys are so white" I burst out laughing.. Ok there Steve, sorry about your luck, but your dear son has and will always have a nicer tan than you..lol.. I still chuckle at that slip. I, on the other hand am really looking forward to some Haitian sun. My skin is tooooo white (almost blue) and this winter cold is making it crack and dry... some nice sun always helps my skins moisture :-) I am not one to bask in the sun, I much prefer the shade, but a couple little rays feel good!
This morning found me up super early. "Joy de vive???" or the wonderful smell of fresh coffee brewing...
I was up just after 6, I decided to shower right away because I seem to get more done when I get that over with. I have a few odds and ends I want to get done today, but most of all I want to spend some time in Tamaya's room packing and preparing. I still haven't reschedule my flight for the 20th. I know realistically it makes more sense to go the week later, however if I find out this week she is out... I may just have to hop on the plane..lol (I will wait until later this week to reschedule :-)
Steve took the van to work today and because of this freezing weather I have decided to keep Ty home from nursery school. Steve's truck hasn't been driven in 6 months and I would hate to have to have to break down in this way too cold weather with Ty.
Ty had a hard time seeing Steve go to work this morning. He was afraid daddy would be gone for a while again. I did explain that he would be home around lunch time which seemed to help him. Poor little guy. I'm sure this must be so confusing for him. But at least once Steve arrives he will see that he came back.
Oh my... My dear hubby is too funny. The other night while we were all at the table eating diner I commented to Steve how nice his tan was. We compared "colour" and he pipes up "you guys are so white" I burst out laughing.. Ok there Steve, sorry about your luck, but your dear son has and will always have a nicer tan than you..lol.. I still chuckle at that slip. I, on the other hand am really looking forward to some Haitian sun. My skin is tooooo white (almost blue) and this winter cold is making it crack and dry... some nice sun always helps my skins moisture :-) I am not one to bask in the sun, I much prefer the shade, but a couple little rays feel good!
Monday, March 05, 2007
Tamaya's size...
I received an e-mail with all of Tamaya's measurements and weight. She is 35 inches and 25lbs... :-) This enabled me to compare her size to a few children I know and was able to determine all the clothes I have will either just fit, or she has grown out of it... Thankfully I have kept my receipt as well as the tags still on the clothes. The store will give me a credit towards replacements which is great!!!
SO ..... the great news is I get to do some more clothes shopping for her for "free"..lol. I have browsed the old navy site and found so many cute outfits that I can replace her "non-fitting" clothes with. I will buy her spring/summer wardrobe now and just dress it up for the rest of the winter... adding a sweater and tights to her little dresses. :-) I think I may even still have a couple pairs of Ty's too small jeans that could be unisex that she can wear with a nice girlie shirt until spring comes along.
I got my house back in order today which feels PRETTY great. I always feel much better when it is tidy. I feel like I have time to play because my chores are done.
Steve made his famous spaghetti sauce today. Yum, Yum! All those little things that I missed I am appreciating so much. I am not a cook. I make supper only because I have to, I have a few dishes that I make that are really good, but... there is no love when it comes to cuisine. I rather take something out of a box and plop it in the oven. Steve on the other hand enjoys making meals and gets passionate about what he makes, he uses different spices and "kicks it up a notch".
We had such a great day today. Tomorrow Steve goes back to work for the next few mornings then he will be off until mid April. I love just having him here and enjoying our time.
Our adjustment has been REALLY nice. Today was a "perfect" day. We were all in good spirits and spent most of the day just hanging out, playing on the computer, talking and just being together. Tonight we had a few games of pop up pirate as a family. It was really cool to see Steve jump..lol!
SO ..... the great news is I get to do some more clothes shopping for her for "free"..lol. I have browsed the old navy site and found so many cute outfits that I can replace her "non-fitting" clothes with. I will buy her spring/summer wardrobe now and just dress it up for the rest of the winter... adding a sweater and tights to her little dresses. :-) I think I may even still have a couple pairs of Ty's too small jeans that could be unisex that she can wear with a nice girlie shirt until spring comes along.
I got my house back in order today which feels PRETTY great. I always feel much better when it is tidy. I feel like I have time to play because my chores are done.
Steve made his famous spaghetti sauce today. Yum, Yum! All those little things that I missed I am appreciating so much. I am not a cook. I make supper only because I have to, I have a few dishes that I make that are really good, but... there is no love when it comes to cuisine. I rather take something out of a box and plop it in the oven. Steve on the other hand enjoys making meals and gets passionate about what he makes, he uses different spices and "kicks it up a notch".
We had such a great day today. Tomorrow Steve goes back to work for the next few mornings then he will be off until mid April. I love just having him here and enjoying our time.
Our adjustment has been REALLY nice. Today was a "perfect" day. We were all in good spirits and spent most of the day just hanging out, playing on the computer, talking and just being together. Tonight we had a few games of pop up pirate as a family. It was really cool to see Steve jump..lol!
Sunday, March 04, 2007
smooth sailing...
Day 3 of Steve's homecoming has brought on some "emotions" from Ty and I. We are all trying to find our place back in the family and although it's been going very well we are feeling the changes and reality of "reintegration" we are keeping the lines of communications open, and I anticipate our adjustment to be fast and easy.
I really appreciate having him home. I am so grateful for my new found freedom and just the comfort of knowing he is here.
I just need to find my happy medium in these changes. I have been doing a lot of observing, thinking and explaining my feelings and thoughts. I have also been helping Ty with his adjustment while still being careful not to under mind daddy's authority nor give mine away.
I can just imagine how Steve must be feeling in all of this as well, he has been with his troop for 6 months with no children, no wife. He also has to find his way in all of this.
I have no doubts everything will work itself out, but a tour home-coming is certainly different when children are involved.
I really appreciate having him home. I am so grateful for my new found freedom and just the comfort of knowing he is here.
I just need to find my happy medium in these changes. I have been doing a lot of observing, thinking and explaining my feelings and thoughts. I have also been helping Ty with his adjustment while still being careful not to under mind daddy's authority nor give mine away.
I can just imagine how Steve must be feeling in all of this as well, he has been with his troop for 6 months with no children, no wife. He also has to find his way in all of this.
I have no doubts everything will work itself out, but a tour home-coming is certainly different when children are involved.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
My boys...
My many blessings...
I had *almost* forgotten how much Steve really added to our household. I couldn't of asked for a better hubby and father to our children. He is such a great dad and has really just fallen back into his role as daddy. WOW!!!! My hubby is amazing. I have a lump in my throat... it so surreal! I just look at him and get a "WOW" feeling.
This morning he got up with Ty, then he went and got me a yummy coffee. We had a nice chat this morning and I gave him a quick rundown on the "changes" I have made in parenting with the trauma therapy. I love the way Steve really respects my ability to parent and has always been so supportive and on board! It's all those little moments of togetherness that mean so much to me. Our little rituals are all falling back into place. Our Saturday morning ritual of coffee, and chats are back and I'm really enjoying basking in the newness of our rekindled love.
My boys are outside as we speak just puttering. I hear the engine of Steve's snowmobile and his plan is to get all of his toys up and running today. His truck needs a new battery so I'm sure that's on his list of things to get as well.
We had a cute talk about of our new addition. Steve still needs to get her named tattooed on his arm as well. He put a lot of thought into it. He will put her name on his other arm with her astronomy sign faded in the background. He had also decided to add our children's birth dates and homecoming dates. I know it's just a tattoo and all, but just the fact that his children mean so much to him and that he has put so much time and thought into making them so special is just so amazing to me! It *almost* makes me want to get one in their honor as well... maybe someday! Something a little more girlie of course!
I feel like myself again after so long and I am loving it. The joy is beaming off me. My heart is so content, my mind is so free of stress and I am loving all these wonderful, beautiful changes in my life. I must admit Tamaya coming home at this time is so GREAT for her, for us. I am very happy we had some delays, it will only make her transition into our home that much better. I am so ready to be her mom and I am able to now give her the love, attention and stability she needs. I finally received the gift of understanding my son, my children and their needs... and totally see what they needs from me!
Ty is such a changes little boy. He is no longer needing to lash out. He is feeling understood and I'm sure having a even keyed, happy mom has help him tremendously. I am having so much fun parenting him again. I am enjoying him so... and I know I have enough love in my heart to nurture my 2 sweeties!
This morning he got up with Ty, then he went and got me a yummy coffee. We had a nice chat this morning and I gave him a quick rundown on the "changes" I have made in parenting with the trauma therapy. I love the way Steve really respects my ability to parent and has always been so supportive and on board! It's all those little moments of togetherness that mean so much to me. Our little rituals are all falling back into place. Our Saturday morning ritual of coffee, and chats are back and I'm really enjoying basking in the newness of our rekindled love.
My boys are outside as we speak just puttering. I hear the engine of Steve's snowmobile and his plan is to get all of his toys up and running today. His truck needs a new battery so I'm sure that's on his list of things to get as well.
We had a cute talk about of our new addition. Steve still needs to get her named tattooed on his arm as well. He put a lot of thought into it. He will put her name on his other arm with her astronomy sign faded in the background. He had also decided to add our children's birth dates and homecoming dates. I know it's just a tattoo and all, but just the fact that his children mean so much to him and that he has put so much time and thought into making them so special is just so amazing to me! It *almost* makes me want to get one in their honor as well... maybe someday! Something a little more girlie of course!
I feel like myself again after so long and I am loving it. The joy is beaming off me. My heart is so content, my mind is so free of stress and I am loving all these wonderful, beautiful changes in my life. I must admit Tamaya coming home at this time is so GREAT for her, for us. I am very happy we had some delays, it will only make her transition into our home that much better. I am so ready to be her mom and I am able to now give her the love, attention and stability she needs. I finally received the gift of understanding my son, my children and their needs... and totally see what they needs from me!
Ty is such a changes little boy. He is no longer needing to lash out. He is feeling understood and I'm sure having a even keyed, happy mom has help him tremendously. I am having so much fun parenting him again. I am enjoying him so... and I know I have enough love in my heart to nurture my 2 sweeties!
Friday, March 02, 2007
In awe...
Pinch me... is this all real?
My hubby is back... !!!! His presence in the house is so comforting. When he walked in the door it felt like he had never left. It just feels so natural to have our love and laughter back. I can see our adjustment period.. "reintegration" going smoothly. He actually used it as an excuse for a couple things...lol.. I asked him how long this reintegration is "supposed" to take and he said 1-3 months... Jeeezzz did I ever laugh because he had that look in his eyes... the one he always has when he is fibbing. I asked him if this excluded shores and he said "yup"..lol.. I told him he was pretty funny, because according to my watch he would be lucky if he got away with no shores/responsibilities for a couple days! WELCOME HOME BABY!!!.. :-)
Steve is such a laid back kind of guy. He just goes with the flow, nothing in the world bothers him. The contentment in his eyes of just being with us really warmed my heart. Gosh I love him so much and knowing I can just hugs him and be with him feels so nice.
I have been having so much fun just watching Ty take it all in. Tonight Steve and Ty set up a "man" date to watch some hockey tomorrow night. Ty came to me and said "mom, daddy and I are going to watch hockey.. Daddy does NOT like Dr.Phil, and I don't eiver (either)"
Tonight we had fun baking cookies together as a family after our BIG dinner. Ty enjoyed some raw batter and it was to cute to see the mess of cookies scattered all over the cookie sheet. (don't think I got all fancy and have started real baking..lol.. Pillsbury!)
I have had so many people see such a huge difference in me lately. I really have my happy self back. It's so nice to have that umph back. That knowing that everything is alright and everything is coming together. I have received the tools I needed to reinforce my relationship with my hurt boy. I am so happy to have that therapy available in this area. My hubby is home and my baby girl is on her way... what more can I ask for.. Life is GRAND!!! Thank goodness all my stressers were temporary!
I have also "surprised" Steve today by telling him I'm getting him a "new to him" dodge truck and that he can start looking! He humoured me today because he knows I love, love, love yellow vehicles and he found a yellow rumble bee dodge ram in our price range.. Hit 2 dreams with one stone?!? :-) I am totally in, and I did express that his snowmobile would match it very nicely. 
I would also really recommend the movie/book the secret that was featured on Oprah.. HONESTLY, it is so GOOD and so powerful!
It is really about choice, about beliefs and how we really have the ability to make anything and everything happen in our lives. I must admit it rang true to me on so many levels... so so many levels.
My hubby is back... !!!! His presence in the house is so comforting. When he walked in the door it felt like he had never left. It just feels so natural to have our love and laughter back. I can see our adjustment period.. "reintegration" going smoothly. He actually used it as an excuse for a couple things...lol.. I asked him how long this reintegration is "supposed" to take and he said 1-3 months... Jeeezzz did I ever laugh because he had that look in his eyes... the one he always has when he is fibbing. I asked him if this excluded shores and he said "yup"..lol.. I told him he was pretty funny, because according to my watch he would be lucky if he got away with no shores/responsibilities for a couple days! WELCOME HOME BABY!!!.. :-)
Steve is such a laid back kind of guy. He just goes with the flow, nothing in the world bothers him. The contentment in his eyes of just being with us really warmed my heart. Gosh I love him so much and knowing I can just hugs him and be with him feels so nice.
I have been having so much fun just watching Ty take it all in. Tonight Steve and Ty set up a "man" date to watch some hockey tomorrow night. Ty came to me and said "mom, daddy and I are going to watch hockey.. Daddy does NOT like Dr.Phil, and I don't eiver (either)"
Tonight we had fun baking cookies together as a family after our BIG dinner. Ty enjoyed some raw batter and it was to cute to see the mess of cookies scattered all over the cookie sheet. (don't think I got all fancy and have started real baking..lol.. Pillsbury!)
I have had so many people see such a huge difference in me lately. I really have my happy self back. It's so nice to have that umph back. That knowing that everything is alright and everything is coming together. I have received the tools I needed to reinforce my relationship with my hurt boy. I am so happy to have that therapy available in this area. My hubby is home and my baby girl is on her way... what more can I ask for.. Life is GRAND!!! Thank goodness all my stressers were temporary!
I have also "surprised" Steve today by telling him I'm getting him a "new to him" dodge truck and that he can start looking! He humoured me today because he knows I love, love, love yellow vehicles and he found a yellow rumble bee dodge ram in our price range.. Hit 2 dreams with one stone?!? :-) I am totally in, and I did express that his snowmobile would match it very nicely.
I would also really recommend the movie/book the secret that was featured on Oprah.. HONESTLY, it is so GOOD and so powerful!
It is really about choice, about beliefs and how we really have the ability to make anything and everything happen in our lives. I must admit it rang true to me on so many levels... so so many levels.
He's home...
I figured Steve's flight would have been delayed again. I called the base last night and the guy really had no clue.. So I figured I would get some sleep and if Steve needed me to come get him he would call me.. right? I awoke a few times making my sleep very interrupted and not really restful. I awoke at 6:30am with Ty and decided to call the deployment centre around 7ish.. they said that the guys were due to arrive in 45 minutes.. OH MY.. rush, rush, rush.. I called my girlfriend and convinced myself because of the weather I had lots of time. I decided to have a coffee, sit and talk with her on the phone... no stress...lol
Then my friend (The one I was on the phone, got a call from someone we know from the deployment centre and told her to let me know Steve was already on base... OOOPS... and she offered to bring him home with the duty van (military van) I thought...hmmm, by the time I drive all the way to base in a storm he could be home... soooo...lol... He came home in the duty van with our neighbour that was also coming home today!
No stress..lol.
Ty's therapy was cancelled today due to the weather so it looks like I will postpone my travels to Haiti to the 20th 27th.. Ty's home-coming date was the 27th of March... :-) He has already been home close to 3 years... WOW, How cool is that if they have the same homecoming date! Plus the bonus about the 27th, it's also my parents wedding anniversary!
Things are great on the home front. Ty has been exceptionally wonderful. He hasn't any tantrums at all for at least a month. He has even given himself a time-out a few times..lol.
It was so cute when he saw his daddy pull into the drive way. :-)
I am at a very peaceful place about life. I have really decided stressing over stuff is REALLY not worth my time and energy. Instead I am focusing on my blessings and appreciating. I have been enjoying nesting/preparing. Yesterday I washed up some of her jammies and socks.. it was so cool to fold them all up. In a couple days I will spend some time in her room and get things really ready.
Then my friend (The one I was on the phone, got a call from someone we know from the deployment centre and told her to let me know Steve was already on base... OOOPS... and she offered to bring him home with the duty van (military van) I thought...hmmm, by the time I drive all the way to base in a storm he could be home... soooo...lol... He came home in the duty van with our neighbour that was also coming home today!
No stress..lol.
Ty's therapy was cancelled today due to the weather so it looks like I will postpone my travels to Haiti to the 20th 27th.. Ty's home-coming date was the 27th of March... :-) He has already been home close to 3 years... WOW, How cool is that if they have the same homecoming date! Plus the bonus about the 27th, it's also my parents wedding anniversary!
Things are great on the home front. Ty has been exceptionally wonderful. He hasn't any tantrums at all for at least a month. He has even given himself a time-out a few times..lol.
It was so cute when he saw his daddy pull into the drive way. :-)
I am at a very peaceful place about life. I have really decided stressing over stuff is REALLY not worth my time and energy. Instead I am focusing on my blessings and appreciating. I have been enjoying nesting/preparing. Yesterday I washed up some of her jammies and socks.. it was so cool to fold them all up. In a couple days I will spend some time in her room and get things really ready.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
